Dear Bossip: My Best Friend Confessed That She Is Pregnant By My Boyfriend

Dear Bossip,

I was with my boyfriend for 3 years and we were talking marriage. We were in the process of moving in together and things couldn’t have been better.

Then, one day, my friend came to me and told me she was pregnant. I was happy for her because she always wanted to be a mother, but I got concerned when she refused to look me in the eyes while we were talking about it. She seemed kind of depressed about the happy news. I asked who the dad was and she gave me a blank stare. Then, a week later she broke down and came to me and told me that she and my boyfriend were sleeping together every time I went out of town for work and he was the dad. I didn’t give her a chance to explain herself because what could she say.

That day I cut her off and I broke up with my boyfriend. He tried to play stupid like he didn’t know why. He came to my house 2 days later crying and apologizing and begging me to not throw 3 years down the drain. He wanted me to take him back because I was the best thing that ever happened to him. I politely asked him to leave and to never contact me again. I told him to just worry the baby he has on the way.

I am trying to move on with my life, but both my ex-friend and my ex-boyfriend are trying to make me out to be the bad guy for wanting nothing to do with them when they did me wrong. I’m just trying to live my life without them constantly harassing and bothering me. What should I do? – Fed Up

Dear Ms. Fed Up,

Gotta give you props – You did the right thing. There is nothing to discuss, nothing more to be said, and nothing to talk about. The dirt and deed has been done. They obviously weren’t concerned about you while they were laid up and getting it in. Your ex-best friend and ex-boyfriend, the two people you loved and trusted, had you believing they were committed to you. Girl, they were committed to each other. Cut them both off, move on, and go through the process of eliminating them out of your life for good!

They both have a lot of nerve and audacity to come to you crying, apologizing and begging you to remain in their lives. Why? What for? They were sleeping together behind your back, and lord knows for how long. Every time you went out of town they were together. They slept together, probably in your bed, and were holed up while you were out of town working. You’re texting and calling them and they are acting like nothing is going on. Hell, they probably were laid up together while you were texting and talking to them on the phone.

But, to be frank and honest, they were in a relationship, and you were the side chick! You out here working and thinking you’re in a long-term committed relationship, but your boyfriend and your best friend are having another whole entire relationship. That is some low-down dirty sneaky conniving gutter –ish. They both are trifling and belong together.

Now, your ex-boyfriend is coming to you crying and begging asking for you to take him back. Uhm, hell to the no! You were discussing marriage, and creating a family with him. You and he were in the process of building a life together. And, all along he was banging your best friend, feeding you lies, keeping you content, and making you think and feel you were in a monogamous relationship. Why is he crying and begging now? Hell, it took him 2 days to figure out why you broke up with him. SMDH! Now he is crying and apologizing and talking about you’re the best thing that ever happened to him? Really? How so? If you were the best thing to happen to him, and he was so in love, and he wanted to make you his wife, then why did he cheat, and cheat with your best friend? That is so low down and dirty. He is a scum bag dog. He is only sorry because he got caught. Trust and believe had your ex-best friend gotten pregnant, they would still be sleeping together, and acting as if nothing ever happened. Their relationship would continue well into your marriage, had you gotten married. SMDH!

And, your ex-best friend had THE NERVE to sit up in your face, acting depressed, and putting on this sob act and look as if she truly regrets sleeping with your man, and getting pregnant. Ma’am, she, too, is only sorry that she got caught. She would have kept up this charade of her being the doting and caring best friend, and would have stood at your side as your bridesmaid at your wedding. She would have stood there even right after they had slept together just before the wedding. Trust it would have happened.

Now, she’s crying and acting depressed came with the news she’s pregnant, as she should have, but sat up in your face and confessed that your man was her child’s father. She then proceeded to tell you that they had been sleeping together every time you went out of town for work. WOW! Naw, she is not your friend. Never was. No friend does that. No friend could have that much gall to sit up in your face and laugh, talk, hang out with you, hold your secrets, and claim to be down for you, yet, they are sleeping with your man. Nope. I can’t and refuse any friend would do something like that. And, nope. You don’t owe either of them anything. They are exactly where they need to be – OUT OF YOUR LIFE!

To keep them out of your life, block them, their access to you, and stop answering and taking their calls. Don’t respond to their texts. Hell, change your number. Block them on all your social media. If your ex-boyfriend continues to show up at your home, then call the police. File an harassment, and if you need get a restraining order. And, yes, I understand it may be hard moving forward because two people you loved and were instrumental in your life betrayed you. Two people you trusted and confided in destroyed your trust. But, just know that you did the right thing. You don’t have to hold to anger toward them. You can forgive, but don’t forget. Be thankful that you know the truth now, and that you eliminated the drama, stress, and two people who were potentially holding you back from your greatness. Be glad you now know the truth about your friendship, and your ex-boyfriend. This is a valuable lesson. Take heed. Don’t repeat it. Thank God that you can move on and heal, and that you can open the door for potentially new loving and caring relationships. When one door closes, well two doors, trust and believe new doors will open. – Terrance Dean

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