Okay ladies, if you haven’t noticed…the trending topic this week is lying and cheating. Yesterday, the Bossip team posed a question to our lady readers asking if they would stay with a man who cheats. But how do you know he does if you haven’t caught him in the act? As we all know, men have a tendency to sweet talk their ladies into believing they are more than faithful when, in truth, he’s a cheating ass. As always, women are inclined to give their guy the benefit of the doubt and chalk up our gut feelings to being overly suspicious. Couple that with the conversation you had with homeboy confronting his sketchy behavior when he hit you with the “you trippin’ I would never do that to you” or “those are your insecurities,” and suddenly you’re convinced…”I am trippin’.” But ladies, read the signs! If you have the feeling of unrest or suspicion, pay close attention because there are behavioral patterns that point to infidelity.
1.) Senseless Arguments – every couple bickers and nags occasionally, that comes with the territory. However, if your guys seems to get overly irritated at things that haven’t been a problem but suddenly he can’t stand that you don’t put the cap on the toothpaste, something’s up.
2.) Frequently Threatens to Bail – this behavior can be coupled with No.1, if your guy threatens to leave the relationship every time you argue over foolish nothings, he’s looking for an out. For example, if your guy fusses over the toothpaste and he says “you know what, maybe this isn’t working,” or “I think we need a break,” you already know what it is.
3.) Frequent Late Nights – if at one time you could expect your man to reach out or come home at a certain time, and the entire routine of your union unravels and comes to a screeching halt, this could be a sign. If your guy starts to keep late nights regularly, and is always out with one particular “boy” or “cousin,” chances are he’s seeing someone else.
4.) Random Overtime – to follow up on No. 3, overtime hours could also be a camouflage for those frequent late nights. If you always get that phone call around the time he normally comes to see you or comes home, and he tells you he’s “working late,” you may want to be concerned, especially if you can’t reach him for hours or until the following day.
5.) Spending Habits Change – one thing is true about a man: he will not be dishing out cash on more than one woman, period. If you guys used to paint the town red, with dinner and movie dates and take vacations but suddenly it stops, that’s a red flag. Of course if he’s saving for a house or taking on a personally funded project, then naturally the cash flow will be affected. But if he’s making excuses about why he can’t take you out, he may be spending his cash on someone else.
6.) Verbal Abuse – every relationship has their ups and downs, and at times hurtful things will be said. But if your man seems to be taking digs at you for no real reason and seems to find joy in hurting you, not only is he a douche bag, he’s probably a cheating one.
7.) He’s Suddenly a Gym Rat – if working out and getting ripped is a new found priority for your man but he’s never been a fan of the gym, be weary. If the two of you have put on a few good eating and sleeping pounds, but he just has to get rid of them, he may be seeing someone else. Those are fat deposits the both of you put on together, therefore, you should lose them together. If he’s hitting the gym without you, he’s probably doing some other things without you too.
8.) He Starts Asking Hypothetical Questions – “is it possible to love more than one person at a time?” is a question that is more than just hypothetical. If he’s asking these kinds of questions, he’s probably feeling some kind of way, maybe torn between his feelings for you and the other girl. Instead of answering the question, seek the reasoning behind the inquiry.
9.) Deletes Cellular Communication – if you’re the type to go through your man’s phone, and you notice that he hasn’t made or received a call or text for more than two days, he’s been deleting his history and clearly has something to hide. If he’s deleting, he’s cheating.
10.) Condoms – if you have been in a lengthy relationship with a man, more often than not, birth control pills are the contraceptive of choice. If you’re on the pill, but you start finding condoms in your guy’s pockets and wallets, you should know he’s either sleeping with another girl or trying to. And, you should start using them with him, pills don’t shield disease.