Question of the Day: Why Are Successful Black Women Still Single???

- By Bossip Staff Categories: For Discussion, News, Question of The Day

Oprah

Recent studies show that successful Black women are twice as likely to be married by the age of 45 than white women with the same educational background.

Hannah Bruckner, who leads the Center for Research on Inequalities and the Life Course at Yale University, says the disparity can be partly explained by a difference in dating preferences between some black men and women.

“Black men are more likely to marry outside of their race, and black women are more likely to marry outside of their education,” she says.

Bruckner says that is compounded by tough competition for a smaller pool of highly educated black men.

Discuss…

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  • http://twitter.com/deevac coi

    oprah has said she doesnt want to get married before…marriage isnt for everyone.

  • http://perryone779@yahoo.com rose by any other name

    Simple answer because most black men are intimidated by women like Oprah and white women marry at the drop of a baseball cap, they need to be validated and black women have more confidence then to settle for the first thing that comes along .. thats why~~!

  • Nique

    Because of their attitudes! Honestly ALOT of black women have attitudes and it doesnt matter what level of education they recieve. I think the word submit is such a bad word, but its something that has to happen. It doesnt matter what degree you have, you are not the man in the relatonship. Let the man be a man , and you are the woman but we cant be both. Until we learn to understand that-this trend is going to continue.

  • Minority Report

    I think Coi raised a very valid point. I know quite a number of successful black women who have partners but do not want to get married.

  • http://Bossip RALPH/LAUREN

    THEIR STANDARDS ARE TOO HIGH.ALL THEY WORRY ABOUT IS WHAT THE NEXT PERSON IS GOING TO DO FOR THEIR SUCCESSFUL SELFISH SELVES.THEY FAIL TO REALIZE RELATIONSHIPS ARE ABOUT GIVING AND EXPLORING AND FINDING YOUR WAY.THEY DON’T KNOW YOU ARE NOT IN LOVE UNTILL YOU HAVE EXPERIENCED RELATIONSHIP DRAMA THE MAKE-UP AND BREAK UPS.THEY THINK IT’S SUSPOSED TO BE ALL GOOD AND REALLY THEY ARE BORING THEMSELVES AND THE PEOPLE THEY DATE TO DEF.

  • http://www.freewebs.com/bestsexever redcora

    only 33% of Black Women are married.. I’m gonna start looking outside my race for a man… oooppsss too late

  • Miss B

    I agree, marriage isn’t for everyone.

    Some females aren’t cut out for the wife role. Nothing is wrong with that.

  • lala land

    marriage isnt for everyone, and as far as black women are concerned, there is no one reason why so many are not married. Were NOT all the same!!!!

  • Miss B

    Some women see relationships as drama & rather not get into it. They are comfortable & satisfied (maybe even selfish) with the way their lives are now.

    I don’t knock Oprah.

    @Redcora….
    I feel you on looking into other races.

  • http://www.myspace.com/miss_kesha Miss Kesha86

    There are more black men in jail than there are in college. That’s a sad reality.

    I don’t know why educated black women would rather date low-educated black men just because they’re black. Date outside your race! Brothers have been doing it for years, I don’t understand why black women are so hesitant to date white, Asian and Hispanic men.

    The number of educated, successful black men is low. Don’t settle for less just because their skin is brown. I’m from Oregon and all there is up there is white guys and when I went to college there, I dated a few. Wasn’t bad at all.

    I’m just sayin….

  • THE TRUTH _ Pretty brown eyes

    I THINK IT HAS A LOT TO DO WITH MEN BEING INTIMIDATED BY A SUCESSFUL BLACK WOMEN. THE ONLY DEFENSE MEN HAVE IS OH SHE’S STUCK UP WHEN THEY FEEL LIKE THEY CAN’T MEASURE UP.

  • holla

    before that argument goes any further…kill that sh!t at once. Aint nobody intimidated by a chick having money. She got money…err ok and? Nope its because most white chicks grew up with money so its nothing. Black women with money usually made the best out of a bad situation (poverty) so they value money more but alot more use it as a bargaining tool in their relationship. When they argue, you get the frequent…i dont kwow why i’m with your broke azz anyways, i make more money and dont needs 2 b takin care of no man. This time, the dude aint broke at all, he just aint making as much as she is so she uses that to belittle him. White chicks just cry and scream and break ish and tell u how much they hate u and blah blah….black chicks go for the your male ego. Its harder on black males than white males because in most poor black neighrbourhoods, all you have is your image and you value that so for a woman to take that away from you..she takes just about everything that u hold dear to you as a man. Aint nobody intimidated by no trick having money. She got money then that’s great so i could look to make something better for us with the little i got and she can save hers so even if we dont work. She still has hers and i am making the best of what i can with mine. Its a pro not a con so that intimidation talk is BS

  • DR.FUNK

    Sure…White girls get married at a higher clip.They also get DIVORCED at a higher clip.Net result: Pretty much the same as sista’s.This ‘aint no “disproportional negativity” on Black women scenario.
    This story speaks more to GENDER than RACE anyway.Men of all colors have come to realize the pure folly of locking into this foul institution.(marriage)

  • Rrrrroe Ski Love- A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

    @ RALPH/LAUREN Good point. As you can see black women are still in denial about this subject. When black women become successful there standards suddenly increase and they want a Denzel type (perfect man according to them)Meanwhile they think negative thoughts about a regular hard working man. They have real shitty attitudes and in reality dudes aren’t checking for them. Thats why a guy like Lamar Odom chose C. Kardashian over one of them. They really are not happy being single, it’s just a front for their own insecurities. This is their MANTRA-What’s mine is mine and whats yours should be mine. Give me a poor woman who loves me for me, over one who only considers material things as a barometer of success.

  • Aunt Viv

    Y’all got this from the NPR article a few weeks ago.

    I agree with the sista in the article who said that successful black women need to redefine their ideal partner, as there are plenty of prospects out there, we just need to be more open.

    We are the only race of women who are ingrained with the thinking that we need to accept the real possibility that we may end up unmarried, especially if we have achieved a certain level of success. I personally think that’s sad. I agree that marriage may not be for everyone, but for many of us who want to get married, I have a problem with being preached to that it’s OK if it doesn’t happen. I don’t know, I’m engaged so it doesn’t affect me, but so many of my successful sista friends have that mindset that now that we’re in our 30s and have good jobs and MBAs we should just forget about ever finding a man. If we expand our options, we can increase our odds, and decrease the likelihood of being successful baby mammas.

  • Tony Redds ( I got luv for the ladies of Memphis!

    I dont beleive this research. Every case is different however the more a woman/man is involved with their carrer, especially if you on Billionaire status, the less time you have for a love life.

  • Rrrrroe Ski Love- A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

    Sorry Sisters white, hispanic, asian, russian african men aren’t checking that much for you. They already know about the strong black woman syndrome. You better try to get the brothers to come back home, because your losing the race big time.

  • theone2

    thing is most white men are use to white women being nice and no attitude and negativity everytime so they are reluctant to date black women. so even if some black women go outside their race they are not guaranteed successs.

  • http://www.myspace.com/miss_kesha Miss Kesha86

    Rrrrroe Ski Love- A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

    Sorry Sisters white, hispanic, asian, russian african men aren’t checking that much for you. They already know about the strong black woman syndrome. You better try to get the brothers to come back home, because your losing the race big time.
    ___________________________

    Ha! Tell that to my boyfriend. The attitude you have about black women is sickening. Must be personal, lol.

  • JANITATION

    Back women have attitude problems.. They don’t know how to treat black men because they don’t know there fathers. They learn how to treat black men frow other women how don’t have a successful relationship either. Bottom line if you don’t have a good relationship with your first man..your dad.. then nobody else stands a chance!!!

  • AllRightNow

    LO and KK dated about a month before he decided to give her his heart bank account – (no pre-nup). I’m hoping its true love that will last a lifetime, but what’s the likelihood? They learned from their mama to never settle for less than a celebrity or someone bringing in the big bucks. No matter what they have to put out there to get it. SHAME, SHAME!!!!

  • Atl_Finest

    We need to stop those excuses that marriage isn’t for everyone. I don’t know a single sista who don’t want to get married. Hell I have never met a woman of any race who didn’t want to be married. May sistas are embarrased to admit the dating pool is smaller the higher you climb up the ladder. Obesity & out of wedlock kids are just 2 reasons why many sista’s are not marketable with other races of highly educated men. I know a young black woman just graduated law school with 4 baby daddys. Who do you think is going to want her beside Pookie.

  • http://www.myspace.com/miss_kesha Miss Kesha86

    Aunt Viv

    Y’all got this from the NPR article a few weeks ago.

    I agree with the sista in the article who said that successful black women need to redefine their ideal partner, as there are plenty of prospects out there, we just need to be more open.

    We are the only race of women who are ingrained with the thinking that we need to accept the real possibility that we may end up unmarried, especially if we have achieved a certain level of success. I personally think that’s sad. I agree that marriage may not be for everyone, but for many of us who want to get married, I have a problem with being preached to that it’s OK if it doesn’t happen. I don’t know, I’m engaged so it doesn’t affect me, but so many of my successful sista friends have that mindset that now that we’re in our 30s and have good jobs and MBAs we should just forget about ever finding a man. If we expand our options, we can increase our odds, and decrease the likelihood of being successful baby mammas.
    ________________________________

    Totally agree, especially about the last few sentences.

  • http://comcast pooh

    Black women are confused… They would rather hang out with their girlfriends, instead of trying to make a meaningful relationship… And they are very materialistic, they value Gucci more than they would value a marriage…

  • JANITATION

    Black women are way to big!! Nobody wants to marry a fat chick!! I don’t care how smart she is!! How are black men going to respect black women when they disrespect themselves by eating and talking to much!!!

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