Good day Bossip readers! First, I wanted to say thank you for all the lovely feedback and topic ideas for our love, relationship and sex column! Your response was amazingly positive and inspiring! One particular topic suggestion stood out because it got me thinking. How does one impress their future in-laws? This can be an extremely frightening encounter. The nervousness alone is enough to have someone on the verge of sickness not knowing what to expect, if they’ll like you and, most of all, will their opinion change the way your partner feels about you? But fret not, there are ways to combat the anxiety and perhaps the best way to do so is being prepared! You should brace yourself for the best and worst, because meeting the parents could take your relationships to new heights OR make you want to bail from not only the dinner table, but your significant other as well! So pay attention because you might not make the cut after Mom and Dad get a hold of you. Hell, after meeting them, you might not want to! Even if it doesn’t work out, you want to leave an impression … something to be desired. So take a look at these tips to impress your would be in-laws and let us know your thoughts! Remember to e-mail your feedback and topics to loveandrelationships@bossip.com!
1.) Do Your Homework - in the days leading up to meeting the parents ask your guy/girl what their mom and dad like to do for leisure. For example ladies, if Mom reads books, find out what type and her favorite author to keep the discussion light! If you don’t know about that particular writer, ask her about it! Fellas, sports is the default topic for most men but if you or Dad are not the sporty type, try for occupations. Try and stay away from politics and religion unless you already know you both agree.
2.) Be Natural - parents who are open-minded, accepting and excited to meet you will make this easy. But unfortunately, this is not the case with everybody’s Mother and Father! Especially if you’re dating the wild child of rigid no non-sense parents! If you’re not religious and don’t know scriptures word for word, don’t act like you do or pretend to be something you’re not. But be prepared to answer those questions! Always be open to be educated. For example, “No, I don’t know a whole lot about why Cain killed Abel, would you please explain?” You can’t go wrong with this approach. Furthermore, it gives them a chance to do all the talking.
3.) Be Helpful- Ladies, the kitchen is the default location to help your man’s mom. Even if she says she doesn’t need help, insist. If there’s dishes that need to be dried or washed, just do it. Or instead of asking, say “Mrs. ___, let me help you with those dishes, so you won’t be shackled to the kitchen after the meal. Everything smells delicious!” Fellas, you can help Mom and Dad if you see the man struggling with heavy objects, give him a hand, no questions asked. If you see Mom reaching for something in a tall cabinet, grab it, no questions asked. Be a man’s man and you’ll get crazy kudos. Pretty boy don’t lift a finger but to smooth the eyebrow types get talked about in the worst of ways, if not, embarrassed.
4.) Know Your Boundaries - Ladies, please don’t go to Mom with the idea that you may know him better than she does. This is a one way street to the side eye! While you may know what he does and doesn’t like, let her be the first to tell you since she was the first to know. For example, if you’re making sandwiches and your guy doesn’t like mayo, pull it out the fridge anyway and she’ll quickly let you know he’s doesn’t like mayo. Your response: “I’ve been told, but I thought you might like some.” Now she loves you. Fellas, stick to the idea that you don’t know the man’s daughter inside and out yet! He’ll share a story or two and it’s okay to say, “No. I didn’t know that about her.” Because you never want to be blindsided with with the “so how well do you know her?” Or “you know her quite well, huh?” Spare yourself the discomfort and remember you’re an outsider in their eyes.
5.) Dress The Part – Ladies, a simple dress and not so high heels are always great but be mindful of the necklines and dress lengths. Never know what the parents have gone through, and dear old Dad might be a throwback ladies man and finds that your breasts look awful nice and can’t take his eyes off them. Awkward and, not to mention, embarrassing to Mom. You get it. Jeans work too, but make sure they’re not the tightest pair you own, and if they are, wear something to cover your bum. Fellas, sagging is not cool, period. Jeans and pants that fit are a good look, and dress them up with a polo or button-up and a nice pair of shoes! No kicks, no timbs, for the first time at least!
I hope these first few tips help anyone who may be facing the parents in the near future! Look for Part 2 soon!
E-mail your topics and feedback to loveandrelationships@bossip.com
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