Jesus Take The Wheel
Posted by Bossip Staff
This is Alan Patton, Urine Connoisseur:
Police charged a northwest Columbus man with criminal mischief for allegedly planning to collect young boys’ urine and drink it. Alan Patton was recently spotted in restrooms at Sports Ohio two weeks ago. According to a police report, Patton, 56, the female employee recognized him as the same man she saw the previous week “putting Saran Wrap on toilets and cups in urinals.”
The employee called police and found Patton walking out of a restroom stall with a black duffle bag.
In 1994, Patton pleaded guilty to a charge of gross sexual imposition against an 8-year-old boy. He served four years in prison and was labeled a sex offender. Then, in 2006, Patton was caught at a Gahanna movie theater and was accused of watching little boys urinate. Police said that Patton admitted to collecting boys’ urine and even paid them for it. Patton was charged with voyeurism.
Police said that Patton would turn the water to the urinals off, place a cup inside and then collect the urine after a boy went to the bathroom.
Woah – this cat is highly deranged. Let’s get this straight, he’s a fan of the mellow yellow, who carries his contraband around in a duffel bag. Where have we heard this before?



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ok, the old azz stories appearing on Bossip is getting annoying.
Lol Wow, He should sell his bodies part now, so his family can at least live decently, because he won’t last long in prison
ohhh YUCK YUCK YUCK YUCK! Obviously, he is a very sick individual!
He needs deliverance!!! That is soooo nasty!!!
gross,ewwwwwwwww
Who in the hell does this nasty stuff??? This man is sick
LMAOOOOO!!! OMG! That is crazy. People are really freaky deaky out here! Collecting urine in a cup and drinking out. Isn’t that poisionous? There is no end to people’s craziness.
JesusMaryandJoseph that may be one of the most disgusting things I have ever heard. Yeah, he won’t last long in jail-lil’ boy urine withdrawal n’ all…gross.
I thought he was running a false drug-testing pyramid scam
I thought he was running a false drug-testing pyramid scam
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
**Dead**
what a pervert!!!
not to sound racist but white men think of the most outrageous sick stuff to do humans.
He needed the pee to wash down the slice of sh&% he ate.
LMAO@No Condom Needed!!!!!!
mmmmmm Tangy!!! Lmao sorry i had to lmaoooooo
sick ***** cracker ***** crackers lol
SICK A$$ *****.
Main Entry: scopophilia
Part of Speech: n
Definition: sexual stimulation or satisfaction from looking at naked people, most often without their knowledge; a love of looking at people in this way; also called scoptophilia, voyeurism
Etymology: Greek skopeo ‘to view’
____________
Wow I had to look that one up!
How are sick people like this allowed to continue to walk the streets. I hope someone hangs him upside down from his D**K when he gets to jail. Dumb***** pedophiles.
uh is that Negrodamus. im getting confused….whats happening to you bro. you provide my laugh of the day. i tell my internet friends to look out for you and then i see your pic on somebody else.
is he a fake. give us the real Negrodamus
What is it with sickos and their obessions of the underaged? Find someone your own age with your “preferences” and leave the unsuspecting children out of it.
WHAT in THE ever loving *****???? What is wrong with people? This is on another level. I’m not for *****ing on anyone, but even a female who is on her knees and enjoys a little splish slash is not at as bad as this guy. This is on another level altogether.
@Meeko
lol this is the real Negrodamus…I’m also “Dis ***** Here” and “Mr Unsafe Sex”
Your also dis ***** here? U the ***** that always givin me problems and *****!
I HOPE YOU BLK BYTCHES THAT SWIRL, I HOPE YOU DATING A *****KER LIKE THIS TOILET BOWL! THIS FREAK OF NATURE!
@ Negrodamus, stop changing your name, be an original your other names are wack as hell anyway….we love you just the way you are…
This is a sick f*cker. They shouldn’t have let his @ss out of jail the first damn time. SMDH
Ewwwwww, *****.
Just let the man be! If people actually want Obama to be president they mind as well let this guy go about his business!
Man this is about one of the sickest human on the planet..everytime i see a white person i lock my car doors!
@ Brooklyn…. whats up bro? @ slide like a new pair of gaters….. you in the building my man.. i just love typing out your name!!!
LOL @ Bossip fan of mellow-yellow, Negrodamus false drug-testing pyramid scam & mojojojo for tangy! LOL!
lol @ urine connoissuer!
LOL @ ms braided beauty!!!
Man this *****er is SICK!!!
Note To The Government And The Police Department: If you are going to let these phedophiles and REAL rapists out of jail [before statotory rapists (I know I speeled that wrong) who aren't ANYWHERE near as bad] atleast give them pyschiatric cl*****es and police supervision. PHEDOPHILES WILL NEVER STOP TRYING TO RAPE AND HARM YOUNG CHILDREN!!! This ***** makes me LIVID!!! Keep them in jail for atleast 25 years to LIFE for each conviction. SMDH!
K-ten… seriously, now thats what you call a phedophile, this man is really sick…do we have to start monitering our pee and shyt/ what has this world come to ….. this creep makes my man kellz look like a saint… and those phedophiles in the FLDS crap are some wack jobs for real… and they do it in the name of God… i dont even use those type of washroom i will find me a bush and let mother nature holla at me!!!! lol!!!!
THE BEAST DONT SLEEP WE HAVE TO STAY READY TO KILL ANY OF THESE F*CK BOYS WHO GO AFTER OUR CHILDREN!
white folks really need jesus… they need to stop with the p@rn and strip clubs and putting others down and look into their own weird selves… b/c they are some sure nuff perverts and looney tunes!
I know a woman who was a prostitute and told us a white man wanted to pay her watch him eat a shyt sandwich… no sex no nothing money to watch him eat that… HOW NASTY CAN YOU GET…everytime i see a white man i think of that perverted crap… is that stereotyping? i dont know but it took me a long time to get over hereing that .. i had nighmares!!!!!!
This one got me speechless… no matter how nasty some creepy white dude is.. the scary thing…is there is a nastier one somewhere in this country.
Put this pedo away for life..they can’t be treated y’all!!! Let the daddies in prison take care of them!
any relation to prostitute patton?
Oh shoot, he the john who knocked up her brown hooker mother?
WOW…. I wonder what happened to him in his childhood…
Unfortunately,working in a prison,I hear these sick stories all the time-some get even sicker.However,I wish the penal system was harder on these freaks because they just come out and do this all over again.The sadder part is that sick *****s like this get so much protection in prison.
A PRAYER LINE NEEDS TO BE FORM ASAP.He needs to leave the ***** alone and cup of holy water
I think they should let their *****es in the general population in prison… let all those daddies, big brothers..cousins…uncles..who love the children in their families…jack them perverts up!
Protecting these fools is a joke..what about the children they violated?
Yes. I deal with the Dept of Corrections and these pedophiles stay in a medium or minimum status facility. Those are the ones with no barb wire or fences at all. Why is that. These people are hurting our kids and getting away with this! Then they make parole the first time and all that but if you steal a loaf of bread to feed your family they are ready to throw you to the wolves. Why is that?
Im sure he eats other things that i would not mention.
nothing satisfy that quenching thirst like a cold cup of *****.lol
thanks for sharing Ms Braided Beauty Chicago stepper.
Now everyone can’t stop thinking that you is the Hoe who that happened to. Dang Hussy, you nasty right wit that old white man.
He really do look just like that other light skin skook doh. Shoot, that really might be her dad! No wonder she all nasty tha fugly stupid looking bow-legged beech.
shoot, no wonder.
Dqueen…sorry you hoe.. but i was sharing a real story and no i wasnt the person it happened too if i was some ***** would be in the ground… and nasty aint the word for that man but dont judge me and you dont know me im just sahring a story that was told me nasty or not thank you!!! but i got your hoe!
What is wrong with these **********as liking pee???? So damn disgusting!
im just me.. i dont know but some stupid idiots just never learn and always quick to judge before looking in the mirror andgoing from there!
totally agree… look before you ******ng leap especially over this way!
Dqueen… you are quick with the name calling but b*tch you dont know me so cut the shyt… dont address me unless you can be respectful… first of all i wasnt even talking to you so speak when spoken to or other wise shut your mouth when you hear grown folks tlak!
girrrrlllllllll, you ain’t got to get on me like dat! Shoot, I got my own free mind and I’m saying, you put some nasty ol pictures in my mind wit yo story. You know, I done seen enough nasty shyte without bossip folks making me think bout a ***** sandwich!!!
don’t get all angry wit me sista, I’m having a gooood day, you know. And I WILL speak my mind as I please, I am Free! You don’t know me to be flipping the script on me like dat now. Girl you is vicious!!!! Chill sister, chill. Sho nuf dat man is nasty. I won’t say some old man collecting and drinking ***** ain’t a sickness but girrrrl, a ***** sandwich is on a whole nother level
Be cool fool. It’s all good, you know.
And by the way, I ain’t no hoe and I ain’t no stupid idiot. Good? Good then girl. Do what you do. I ain’t got nothin but love! Try it, it feel good like black power! Get!!!
I see this guys picture and something about it isnt right, hmm lets see;
1. 45-55 years old
2. white
3. posted in a black chat
OH SH*T thats SMDH!
I knew that was a white n*gga pretending to be a black woman!
now that I thinnk of it, he do look like some LAPD *****!!!
drinking young boys pee????
he may doing that, but it’s most likely a cover for something else this chester is up to.
Glad the justice system saw right through him.
@ ms braided beauty chicagos own chi town stepper
(Check me out!)
white folks really need jesus… they need to stop with the p@rn and strip clubs and putting others down and look into their own weird selves… b/c they are some sure nuff perverts and looney tunes!
—————————————————
You have alot of F%CKING NERVE you NASTY LOW LIFE *****.
Aren’t you the SAME LOW LIFE ***** that was celebrating the fact that RKelly GOT OFF.
Ironically enough your comment fits the SAME F%CKING DESCRIPTION OF WHAT RKELLY IS ABOUT,as seen on a video tape and from witness accounts of the people around him.
Get it through your f%cking head according to the people around him, the girl in the tape WAS NOT THE ONLY ONE.
OH YEAH! HE’S BLACK SO THAT’S COOL WITH YOU.
CHILD MOLESTATION IS CHILD MOLESTATION NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE OR HOW YOU DO IT.
AS FAR AS “LOONEY TOONS” GO COUNT YOURSELF AS ONE OF THEM.
NASTY *****!
@ Low Life B*tch,
Can I have your autograph? I though i was the only person in here who thought anyone who supports RKelly’s child rapist ***** was crazy, he aint gonna stop, they never do, next time the girl will come forward.
Better yet can I have a hug?
@ {{ The INFAMOUS }} Ms. Sugar Walls
(Check me out!)
bamma
He wasn’t the only one *****ing young chicks
It is a lot of white actors that got off *****ing young chicks
so what the ***** are u really saying?
errol flynn
elvis presley
Roman polasnki
and other white men!
————————————————-
This is what CHILDREN MEAN TO THIS LOW LIFE *****.
Other people got away with it so it’s all good if this MOTHER*****ER DOES.
And DEY IS WHITE MEN , LMAO!!!!
TWISTED *****
LOL 6am is clapping loudly!
AMEN!
white people do stupid sick ***** like this!!
why you gotta be the race card??
you know that man got a black daughter too and she light-skinned fly.
i miss my boo…
This guy has posted his personal ad to the wealthy dating site called RICHLOVING.COM for several months. I just visited his profile page yesterday. It seems he has logged in recently. OMG, is he looking for a new relationship?
SHDH, please tell me what that means. Anyone?
THANK YOU CAUCASIAN MAN!!!!!!!
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!GROSS lock his ***** up and dont let him out
Ok… How come crack dealers will get 20yrs in jail for makin their money, yet pervs like this get 4yrs after peepin up on children??… That’s nasty!!! One thing leads to another… These freaks always start out just lookin, then they start fulfilling whatever nasty fantasies they have!!! Ewww…!! I can’t even get over how nasty this dude is!!! Pedos should get LIFE in prison!! No matter if it’s their 1st offense or what the ***** ever the case may be!!! They better keep his ***** in jail, next thing you know, he’ll be kidnapping, sexually *****ualting, and then murdering these lil kids!!! The system is truly pathetic… And I’m A Law Student and have no problem admitting that the system is a bunch of bull*****!
White people can say what they want about blacks, but we damn sure don’t go around collecting ***** and drinking it!!!! That’s some nasty *****!! Pretty much tops anything us blacks could even think of!!! HaHa! KEEP HATIN WHITE FOLKS… OBAMA ‘08!! YES WE CAN!!!
he is a humor guy,many friends like to chat with him online on tall dating site ___T a l l m i n g l e . c o m___,He often told us some funny jokes. Seems he is famous on that site,especially some hot models talk with him positively.
R KELLY HAS NOTHING ON THIS DUDE
AMERICANS ARE SOME DISGUSTING ANIMALS.
I cant even comment on this. Im about to throw up!
HAVE HIM HOLLA AT R.KELLY
?
Technically Roman Polansky, did not get away with it. He was convicted he just jumped bail and has not returned to the US. It is strange that Hollywierd still supports him though…he got some achievement award a while back (which he did not come to accept) and some ppl gave him the standing O and others were kinda confused..it was pretty funny..
Anyway, wish Columbus coulda got a shout for something less creepy but hey…
And RKelly is NO different than this dude (except this dude like boys instead) they are both sick but ppl forgive Kells cause he black… SMH
WRF???? That is GROSS!
Oppppps…WTF!?!?!?!?!?!?
EWWWWW….seriously why in the hell would u wanna drink somebody’s *****. This dude is F*^cking disgusting. ***** like this is y I didn’t wanna have any kids. ppl are sick
THIS MAN AIN’T DRINKIN’ PEE. HE’S SELLIN’ IT TO PEOPLE NEEDING TO P***** DRUG TESTS. THAT’S WHY HE’S ONLY COLLECTING LITTLE BOYS URINE, NOT THAT OF GROWN MEN WHICH WOULD MORE THAN LIKELY BE DIRTY.
Now go and get your urine little duffle bag boy!
LOW LIFE *****…. you nasty stanking trifling dirty whor#.. you are the mother of all who@es you worhtless skank… you damn right i was celebrating and still am you stank useless hoe…. R kelly got off b@tch and aint a damn thing you can do about it you stank tramp…the trial is over hoe so take your nasty as@ on and do what you do … which is get on the internet and read folks comments and name call… bit@h i wish you was in my face you dirty hoe… none of my comments where for you you pathetic trifling b@tch!!!
and one of your friends, enjoy…. i agree LOW LIFE is ia twisted low life whatever you want to call the b@tch!
@ d queen…. good then whatever… but when you call me out i come out! and you have a nice day!
Dqueen… sorry to upset your stomach but i was sharing a true story… shyt happens and that really happen as far as what the woman said… i was just a listener… and i am so over R Kellys trial till its ridiculous… the trial is over i give less then a f@ck who thinks he got off and who the f@ck dont!
just like South African Boy said R kelly has nothing on this dude…. everybody has an opinion and i cant believe these ignorant folks are still talking about this silly bullshyt “arent you the one who supported R Kelly”" YOU DAMN RIGHT ME AND PLENTY MORE! FU@K!
With a name like low life how in the world is that person up here critcizing another/ wow bossip some of these folks need medication.
I tell you white folks is crazy…
this man got caught more then one time doing ***** with kids and they steady letting him out, when will they keep the real criminals behind bars?
the world is coming to an end.
I HEARD THIS IS R.KELLY’S BEST FRIEND THEY OFTEN GO SLUMMING AND FISHING TOGETHER GIVING EACH OTHER ADVICE ON HOW TO TIE UP BARBIE DOLLS NAME CHRISTY AND KENT
BOSSIP GOES EVEN FURTHER THAN MEDIATAKEOUT IN SUPPORT OF RACTIST BLOG!
I am a reader and not a usual blogger, but I cannot believe that no one has commented on the fact that BOSSIP had the site “DRUNKEN STEPFATHER” as one of it “CERTFIED LINKS”! Brothers and sisters WAKE-UP and boycott or at least email them for an explanation!!! DRUNKEN STEPFATHER is one of the most crude, racist, misogynistic blogs I have ever visited!!! They have degrading and derogatory comments on every sister they have EVER profiled. Rise up and call for change. If BOSSIP supports them should we be supporting BOSSIP??? Check out what they have said about the like of Naomi Campbell, Eve, and even our soon to be First Lady! If this doesn’t prove that Bossip is a white owned and self deprecating site nothing will!!!! PLEASE take the time to visit this blog! You will be much wiser about who is writing this one!
LaLaLaLovely—TOTALLY AGREED! I NEVER UNDERSTOOD HOW CHILD MOLESTERS SPEND LIKE 2 YRS IN PRISON BUT DEALERS GET JUST ABOUT LIFE..SMH I JUST DONT GET IT!