There’s always something to learn from stupid criminals. In this case, the lesson is kind of obvious.
A man in the UK recently had to confess to stealing from his neighbor’s vacant apartment after the neighbor’s curtains were seen in his window.
Elizabeth Lowe, prosecuting, told the court the neighbour had moved out of the property and left only a few items inside.
Williams broke down boarding on the home in Slough, Berkshire, and stole the net curtains, tools, two glass ashtrays and some lamb steaks from the freezer.
‘The person at the address had moved out because of an earlier burglary which was nothing to do with this defendant at all,’ Miss Lowe said.
‘They had boards up as a result of having left some items inside of not very much value.
‘They had last checked on May 6 and on May 8 a neighbour had said it looked to him that the boards had been disturbed.
‘In the next door flat they noticed that their net curtains were hanging there.’
However, the defendant denied that it was anything to do with him – but could not say how he got the net curtains, a judge at Reading Crown Court was told.
He later confessed to the crime in police interviews and admitted burglary when he appeared before magistrates court.
You know it’s bad when your own lawyer implies that you’re just too slow to know any better.
Alastair Smith, defending, said that it had merely been an ‘opportunistic’ crime.
‘The fact that this defendant went on to place the curtains in his own window shows a lack of sophistication and realisation of the seriousness of the offence,’ he said.
‘If he realised it could lead to three years in custody he might have taken more time to consider his actions.’
But then again…
The defendant, who has battled alcoholism and drug addiction, has 28 previous convictions for 76 offences dating back to 1985, the court was told.
Williams will now be spending the next two and a half years in jail because this was his fourth time being convicted of a domestic burglary. Those must have been the flyest curtains ever.