Damn, What Do You Really Want? The Fellas Weigh In

- By Bossip Staff Categories: News, Sex and Relationships

Good day, Bossip readers! Here’s to another “Almost There Thursday!” In a previous article, the question was raised: do women really know what they want? A few of our female readers weighed in on what they want in a man and, as promised, we went after the male perspective! Just to recap, this is what prompted the conversation:

“I’m no pretty boy Billy D and I’m not a thug but I’m a man who knows how to treat a woman. Damn what do you really want??” Do you even know? I’m convinced that women don’t know what they want and that’s why men suffer. I challenge your woman readers to speak up and say, with conviction, what they want.”

The statement is as simple as the topic is complex! Can we prevent pain and “suffrage” by knowing what we want and are willing to compromise? Are you realistic in your thought processes? Or, are we so caught up in a feeling, connection or chemistry — so blinded by love our standards and expectations take a back seat? That is until the flame defuses and you find that the two of you might not have so much in common (other than attraction) and he/she is not the “one.” So we asked a few of our male readers, “what do you want in woman?” Not surprisingly, it was hard for some to articulate what they want versus what they don’t want. And some know, without and shadow if a doubt, what they want in a partner. Take a look!

I don’t know. I’m still playing around. It’s like this, I know this woman and she’s everything a man could ever want. She’s smart, she’s driven, she got mad sex appeal and she’s beautiful. I know all I would have to do is say the word and she would be down, I know it. The problem is, I love her enough not to put her through it. She deserves better than what I’m willing to give right now and that’s the honest-to-God truth. I don’t think it’s a matter of us [men] not knowing what we want, a lot of times it’s just bad timing, you know what I mean? – Jeffery, 33

I want a woman who knows how to be a woman. I don’t want her to shutter at the thought of being submissive. Like, why is that such a bad word? You say that word to a lot of women and they get all hot around the collar, I never said I want a slave! That’s another quality I admire, I want a woman who can trust. I want her to know that she can trust me to do the things a man is supposed to do. Trust that I’m not going to do you dirty. Trust that I’m not going to play you. Trust that I’m going to be good to you. I want a woman who’s secure enough in herself to understand a woman’s role in the household. These chick nowadays are so caught up in a lifestyle and “thug love,” they lose sight of what really matters. I want a woman who doesn’t watch the “dumb box” as my grandfather would say. – Neil, 29

A woman who’s real and sure of herself! A genuine woman, is what I want. I was married for 7 years and, granted, we got married very young so neither one of us had a clue as to who we were as individuals. I loved her for the things that she eventually ended up hating about herself. She was cool and had a really positive, optimistic attitude but she changed one me and became angry and negative and hit me with the “this is who I am. Like it or leave it.” Those were her exact words and we tried to work it out but we were different people in the end. I understand growth and evolving but drastic changes in character is bi-polar. I want a woman who knows herself and is comfortable with herself. – Jaime, 32

I dated a girl for two years and she was a great person inside and out but she was a boss at her job and didn’t know how to hang that sh*t up when she came home. I dug her willingness to grind and put in the extra hours to buy a new car and furnish her house, I loved that about her. The crazy part about it was, I make almost double what she was making so I never understood her aggression and her constant need to be in control because I never asked her to pay any bills or pick up the bill when we went out or anything and she never offered to either! She was selfish like that and that was a turn-off. I want a woman who knows that it’s going to take more than good sex to keep me around. It might have kept me around for longer than it should have but when a woman is mean and b*tchy all the time, it’s just unattractive, I don’t care how good she looks. – Anthony, 30

What are your thoughts, Bossip fam? Please share them below!

Please remember to e-mail all topic suggestions, feedback and questions to loveandrelationships@bossip.com!


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