We Watched American Idol Last Night And That Sh*t Was _________

- By Bossip Staff Categories: American Idol, News

Jennifer Lopez, Steven Tyler, Ryan Seacrest, Randy Jackson

The new judges for American Idol made their debut last night with millions of people watching. The reviews are in and most people think the show was ____________.

A judgeless mess. Steven Tyler and J Lo joined Randy to do everything BUT judge the talent. It was evident to anyone watching last night that the one thing missing was the mean.

Critics weighed in throughout the show and flooded blogs with opinions throughout the night and the consensus is in. The talent is meh and the judges are blah.

The first time new gatekeeper Jennifer Lopez had to face the essential task of delivering less than sunny news, she threw up her hands and cried, “This is awful. I can’t do this.”

Even if a contestant had the voice of a deaf yak, she would simply look away, or default to a “deer-in-the-headlights” stare.

When called on to deal with a similar unfortunate situation, fellow newbie Steven Tyler would fashion a pre-set look of empathy and offer a canned suggestion that the kid plow a less daunting path.

For much of the show, Steven Tyler lusted after everything with 2 legs and for a second, you could almost forget he’s in his mid sixties. (Maybe he’s been mummified and preserved by drugs and alcohol.) But for the most part, his plastic face and and impromptu rocker squeals provided the lions share of the comic relief. (And there was very little.)

Thankfully, Randy didn’t “dawg” us to death, but then again he didn’t dog anybody, all night. He never even said someone was ‘ehhhh, kinda pitchy’ which is usually what he ALWAYS says.

J-Lo spent most of the evening whining about telling the contestants they sucked. Considering the fact that she was never known for her vocals, we’re not surprised she had a hard time telling people the truth. She obviously has a hard time telling it to herself.

Overall it gets about a 4.5 on a scale of 1 to 10. What y’all think?



  • miamac

    Hmmph, jury is still out. Waiting until the next show to have an opinion. Anybody can escape the 1st show ’cause of the hype.

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  • Big Kitty

    We’ll see. I liked that little dude Travis’ voice

  • justsweetliy

    I actually liked it. I thought Steven was funny. Jenny was funny 2 b/c of the reasoning in the article. (She can’t sing or tell anyone else that they can’t either.) Randy was Randy. Blah. However, the mean was definitely missinf.

  • justsweetliy

    I actually liked it. I thought Steven was funny. Jenny was funny 2 b/c of the reasoning in the article. (She can’t sing or tell anyone else that they can’t either.) Randy was Randy. Blah. However, the mean was definitely missing.

  • http://itsthepleasureprincipal.com ThePrincipal

    This show is NOT about how well you can disappoint a contestant. Some judges actually have heart. I like Jennifer Lopez as a new judge on this show. To give their judging techniques a 4 just because they didn’t yell “You’re a most disgusting singer I’ve ever heard” is ______. I give ’em a 10.

  • theworldkeepsonturnin

    lol @ she has a hard time telling it to herself.

  • Ash

    I missed Simon not to take away from JLO and Steven Tyler but some of those contestants know damn well they should’ve stayed home and they needed someone to tell them that str8 up!! IMO

  • http://static2.hypem.net/thumbs/2/1089002.png YokoDMV

    i liked it – i laughed out loud i dont really need to hear people say mean things to be entertained and i think JLo was loving them outfit changes and looked fab!

  • KaiSinger

    I auditioned for the show The Voice guys. Let me tell you these shows do not want talented people. Thje Voice is a spin off from the Voice in Holland, like AI was a spin of from AI in London. I auditioned this Saturday in NY, I know I can sing. I sound like a cross between Stevie Wonder, and Kevon Edmunds (After 7) I sand Slow Jam-by Midnight Starr. This skinny white lady is gonna stop me just before I tear the roof off the house with my falsetto, and start giving me compliments, but then gonna say, it’s just not what we’re looking for right now. I just stopped her, said thanks, put the mic back, and left out.

  • ORlando

    We have to get through the 4 weeks of BS before they really get down to business. As long as they don’t end up with people in the top 12 that can’t find a pitch to save their lives….. I’m all good.

  • TheOriginalBlkBarbie

    Steven kept eyeing up any young girl that auditioned. Jen can’t sing so I had no idea how she was going to pull off being a judge and…she didn’t. I like her though. Randy was ok, but he seems like he’s over it.

    I think AI should just wrap things up. It’s time.

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  • TheOne

    The mean was missing because this season’s audition show they showed more of the people that could actually hold a note, where as the previous seasons were all about thoes that couldn’t sing to save their lives.

    • Breezy

      I agree….It seems that there were more people on there that could sing than those coming up with gimmicks and being stupid. I liked the show. Steven and Jennifer are WAYYYY better than Ellen and Kara ever were….

  • bev


  • Peppa

    I missed the show last night. So, were there still like 70% white and 30% blacks?

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