Relationship Debate: “He Only Pushed Me One Time”

- By Bossip Staff Categories: For Discussion, For the Ladies, Love and Relationships

Q: Dear China,
The other day, in a heated argument my boyfriend of six years pushed me. He has punched walls and thrown things in the past, but he has never pushed me before. He apologized and said he’d never do it again, but I am aware of the cycle of violence having worked with victims of domestic violence. Should I give him another chance? I really love him and don’t want to see our relationship end due to one mistake.

Punch Drunk Love

Read China’s answer at

More Stories From Bossip


  • dummies

    Your being groomed for.a royal azz beating. He is also instilling fear dumb azz. Call your mom if she’s crazy she will help you justify it!. If she said you tell you RUN!

    • Laura

      NICE NEWS !
      My friend Vanessa, a 25 yrs lady, has announced her wedding with a m’illionaire young man Ronald who is the CEO of a MNC. It’s amazing, she said she just posted her profile on a m’illionaire d’ating s’ite called ———-RichMatchmaker. ℃○M——– – and received his chat invitations a few days later. Then, everything went so well that I can’t believe it’s true! Every love story will unfold on it’s own..——-
      The next object he throws or punches could be you.

      Think of it this way: If your adult daughter came to you and said her boyfriend pushed her- what would you think? What would you tell her to do?

    • Kyra

      My friends told me about — BlackwhiteCupid. C’ 0- M —–told It’s the best place to meet black white singles. Come in and stay a while. Complete your profile. Post a message, a picture of yourself and check out the photo galleries.

      Give it a try, you will find someone you like there… 😉

    • jmagic

      yeah because its not like women dont instigate 90% of all arguments,they know if it was socially ok for a man to knock them they wouldnt say alot of shyt they do

  • Magnolia

    Time to roll out. Unless you want to be one of those DV victims you counsel…

  • The Ugly Truth

    @ dummies,I agree. It is only a matter of time she will get Chris Brown’d. He has already punched walls & thrown objects. Next it will be a punch, kick, or choke.

    I would go to couples counseling cuz he needs other ways to express his anger. If he gives u the typical NINJA answer “I aint going to no counseling” it is time to B-O-U-N-C-E!

    Wht will happen if u bring kids into this?

  • WithAllHonesty

    When your relationship reaches a point where you’re thinking about or doing bodily harm to one another it’s time to call it a wrap. You’re bringing out the worst in one another.

  • JustAshley

    You know the signs girlie. The next object he throws or punches could be you.

    Think of it this way: If your adult daughter came to you and said her boyfriend pushed her- what would you think? What would you tell her to do?

  • 7lady

    It all depends on the man. You will be taking a chance finding out but that’s the only way you’ll kno. I had the same situation. My dude pushed me over a coffee table, and pulled my hair by the roots while pushing me into a wall. I was scared as hell. I had never experienced that. I sat him down the next day. I told him I’m not going to tolerate that kind of life. I looked him in the eye…i said next time I’m leavin yo azz and that’s a promise. He never touched me again. I swear yall he never did again.

    • G.M.

      DAYUUUM!!! he fucced you up

  • dummies

    Respectfully I dont be YOU! ROUND 2! BUT DONT YOU WORRY I PROMISE TO LET YOU IN! TAKE YOU TO GET A RESTRAINING ORDER AND BUY YOU A GUN! HE KNOWS HE MADE HIS POINT AND INSTILLED FEAR! You keep you a couple of grand in the bank or a charge card reserve!

  • dummies

    *believe*! That mess dont get better it’s like cancer it gets worse! You dont berate the woman you tell her I will help you go but I wont help you stay! Chris Brown wanted help and understood it harmed him more than it ever would ms S&M!

  • WTF


  • 5150

    I bet tina and lameanna said the same thing

  • Sanriobaby =^.^=

    You need to leave this relationship asap and get into some couseling. The fact that you’ve stayed this long when he has clearly shown you his volitle temper which has now increased b/c he has put his hands on you means that you are comfortable around unstable and emotionally abusive men. If a man starts to destroy things and throw things, possibly at you, this man will have no qualms about hitting you once HE FEELS HE CAN. Please leave while you still have the chance. Nothing but hurt and bruises are coming your way if you stay. You say you love him, sweetie, that’s not love, that’s codependancy. Love, real love, doesn’t hurt. Love doesn’t put hands on you when anger arises. Love doesn’t scare nor intimidate you. If you were to ask any women who’s been a victim of domestic violence, they will all tell you they wished they took the chance to leave before things got physical. Good luck, be safe, and most importantly, God Bless.

  • dummies is RIGHT!

    Leave! it starts with a push, then he says he would never do it again, then pulling hair then choking then smacking then punching arms to now black eyes. If he hits u once he will again I always laughed at ppl in dv situations bc I thought it was just as easy as leaving but never judge bc its not like dummies said its instilling the fear.

  • drenk

    if he only pushed you once i hope it was down the steps

  • Nana

    I wish a Nucca WOULD….I would knock him into another decade!!

    Then again he knows better than to as much as Whisper in ma ear at the wrong time…

    Mama didn’t raise no FOOL…

    • benzoe88

      yeah right you woudnt do shiiiit! blcak females always say i wish he would and dont do shiiiit

  • onesmartchickee

    A Glok will equalize any situation. Women if your in this situation, you need to do 2 things. One – Buy a gun and learn to use it. Two – Leave the animal you thought was a human being. You need the gun because ending a relationship with monsters like this takes fire power. Law enforcement and the legal system, in some areas will completely understand.

  • Miss Aj

    I’ve never had to deal with domestic violence thank God. Only a punk would get mad at what someone says to them and tries to hit them! Leave if that’s the case, what are you in 2nd grade?!

  • Nana

    Yeah @benzoe88 the fact that YOU wouldn’t do sh!t doesn’t mean I won’t….

    Like I said I wish someone Would touch me!!!!!!!

    I’ve respect 4 u as a person so why would u disrespect me by touchin me???? Yeah ok……TRY IT!!!

  • shanita102

    @Nana…Word (how he gonna tell someone what they WOULD or WOULDN’T do???) lol

  • Nana

    Yeah haaaaaa! Whatever…..

  • Tisa

    Madame Lenoire site moves sooooo slow. Not to mention when she has a list of items featured and you have to go through pages 1-10+ singly.It’s f**kin annoyin. Please update dat ish. Seriously who time for all that, just show us everything and we can scroll down. Sheesh !

  • fairy tales

    Most every adult female alive who tried to form a intimate relationship has accepted some form of physical or mental abuse however so stop playing like you never had to leave a wreckless bully person! Especially you long suffering “I ain’t going no where ” ladies! My deceased friend a female attorney told me stories about how her and singer Antia Baker took turns driving each other to ER in their respective Benz! That was before they married their beaters. Now divorced Anita has pay his azz for kicking her azz all those years!

  • Awesome-O-3000

    This is extra fake too. You counsel dv victims but need advice on being pushed? Either you’re terrible at your job or I smell a rat.

  • lailani

    OMG… your story reminded me of mine, the only difference was I was married to him, it started with yelling, calling me the B word, punching the wall BUT one day, after an argument, i decided to walk away and my ex came from behind and pushed me into the wall infront of our infant child, he then came over me and said “I am not joking with you, I will put your body in a bodybag and ship you to your parents” THATS when I knew if I stayed he just might act on it. Trust ME it was the hardest decision I have ever made to walk away from the relationship, but our first and only child was premature and only three months old, there was NO WAY I could ever allow my now 2 year old son to grow up in such a hostile and unhealthy environment. From one mother to another BREAK THE CYCLE and walk away or better yet……. RUN.

  • me

    As a woman that was abused all 4 years of my marriage I can say from first hand experience it only gets WORSE and NOT better. My ex punched walls too until he decided that punching me would maybe make him feel a little bit better afterward.

    Which he would quickly follow with “OH BABY I’M SO SORRY, I DON’T KNOW WHAT GOT INTO ME” and “I’LL NEVER DO IT AGAIN, I PROMISE”

    Do yourself a favor and get out while you can. It will hurt at first but you WILL feel better in the end.

    That IS a promise.

  • ManchesterUKer

    It could just have been a one off or it could have been a sign he’s violent, it’s up to you if you want to stick around and find out…

1 2
blog comments powered by Disqus