Kimmy Cakes Doofus Hubby Wants Her Barefoot In The Kitchen Of His Minnesota Lake House With A Gut Full Of Unemployed Baller

We actually feel sorry for this guy. Kim Kardashian’s new hubby Kris Humphries somehow missed the memo that he has signed up for a lifetime of celebrity attention sloring.

The baller, whose current contract is up in the air thanks to the NBA lockout, has been vocal about his distaste for the luxury lifestyle and limelight that Kim treasures and instead has been trying to encourage her to move with him to his “little place” in the Midwest and start popping big-headed green-eyed octoroons from her platinum poon. SMH

Kim Kardashian has only been married for a little over a month, but husband Kris Humphries is already planning to start their family.

In a new clip from E!’s two-night wedding special,”Kim’s Fairytale Wedding: A Kardashian Event,” the New Jersey Nets player, 26, is seen urging his new wife to start settling down and having babies after they tie the knot.

“Maybe you should just move to Minnesota with me,” Humphries says to Kardashian. “We could move into my little place on the lake, we could just start popping out babies.”

Humphries doesn’t hide the fact that he isn’t a fan of his new paparazzi-plagued lifestyle, and even Kardashian is worried about how the increased attention could affect her NBA beau.

“This hectic-ness is only getting worse,” said Kardashian, 30. “[I know] the attention definitely stresses Kris out and I’m nervous to see how that’s going to go.”

Though Kardashian has frequently talked about settling down and having kids on her show, she’s not planning to do that any time soon.

On Friday, the reality star appeared on the “Today Show” and opened up about the possibility of starting a family with Humphries.

“I think I’m going to wait a little bit,” she said. “We’re definitely going to wait at least a year, just because we don’t even know where he’s going to be playing, so we have no idea where we’re living. I think we have to figure that out first before we have babies.”

Translation: Let’s milk this cow while we can and if he doesn’t land a good NBA gig I’m on to the next before ruining my cashtastic cakes for this guy.