Surprise: Lil Miss Slizzard Slutshine Rihanna’s Record Revolves “Almost Exclusively Around Sex!”

Posted on - By

Categories: Cakes, Congratulations, Crotchy-licious, New Music, News, Rihanna, Skanky, SMH, Surprise

Rihanna making raunchy music — Really?

Vh1.com just did a review of Rihanna’s new album “Talk That Talk,” which pretty much proclaims she’s taken music to new levels of raunchiness:

Rihanna‘s new record, Talk That Talk, is the dirtiest “pop” record we have ever heard. We listened to the entirety of the 11-song album, which will hit stores on Monday, November 21, earlier this afternoon here at our Times Square headquarters and can confirm that everyone in attendance left the room with flushed cheeks after experiencing extensive periods of blushing.

Now, this is not to say that Rihanna has gone out and recorded the female As Nasty As They Wanna Be; it’s not simply a sexually-explicit affair (although, at one point during The-Dream produced track “Birthday Cake,” she does proclaim “I wanna f*** you right now”). Rather, Talk That Talk continues the conversation that Rihanna began with her single “S&M” (off Loud) and, if you’ll pardon the Spinal Tap reference, turns it up to 11. Rihanna and her chief partner-in-crime, songwriter Esther Dean (who either wrote or co-wrote at least five songs on the LP), have put together a record that not only oozes sex, but also revolves almost exclusively around it.

Is anybody surprised? Cuz we’re not. Of course it would be a complete tease to tell you all this though and not share some of the music and lyrics that helped them come to this conclusion.

Well we planned on posting the snippets that Rih’s team added to her VEVO account but Universal has shut that ish down already, so here are a few direct examples from Vh1′s review of the album.

Take the album’s fifth track, “Cockiness,” for example. The Bangladesh-produced banger, which sounds like a vintage-era Neptunes jam, begins with Rihanna telling her lover that “I want you to be my sex slave” and contains the refrain “I love it when you eat it.” It doesn’t stop there; in perhaps the album’s most memorable line, Rihanna demands her subject to “Suck my co**iness / Lick my persuasion.” This line, which got all of the attendees in the room we were in to nervously chuckle, is the kind of line that would’ve got Rihanna called in front of Congress if Tipper Gore were still running the PMRC, and the kind of song that would make even Prince‘s famed protagonist “Darling Nikki” squeal.

It’s not just that track, either. On the Stargate-produced “Roc Me Out,” RiRi complains that “You’re taking too long to get my head on the ground / And my feet in the clouds,” before cooing, “I’ve been a bad girl, daddy.” And during “Watch n’ Learn,” produced by up-and-comer Hit-Boy, she goes to great lengths to detail how she wants it on the bed, the floor, and the couch, before turning the tables and not-so-subtly instructing that “It’s your turn now / Watch and learn now / Watch and learn how.” Trust us, the things she’s teaching in this song certainly aren’t taught in schools (at least not without a permission slip signed by your parents).

With that said, would you want your pre-pubescent kids listening to this stuff? Just a question.

Please discuss!

Click to listen to snippets on the nextpage.

More from MommyNoire

More from StyleBlazer & MadameNoire

blog comments powered by Disqus
No thanks