Pilar Sanders Speaks On Deion Sanders Divorce And Domestic Abuse
Tanya Young Williams (yes from BBWs and Jayson Williams) interviewed Pilar Sanders
on her troubled marriage with Deion Sanders
. Despite Prime Time's denial of any physical/domestic abuse, Pilar says otherwise...
Q: You’ve stated that Deion has abused you in the past. In what ways?
A: Many ways. Financially it started before Christmas and continues until today. He just stopped providing for the family. He cut credit cards. He cut financial support … No resources at all, whatsoever. Even when we’re still in the house, my daughter would beg for clothes, he wouldn’t buy her any clothes. It would come to a point where she would say, dad will you get me a sandwich from Subway and he would be like, no – that’s a five dollar sandwich. He would tell her go ask your mommy. What he would try to do was use every piece of leverage he could ever get a hold of and try to use against me and try to turn the children against me. So what he was telling the kids was that basically, if you stay with me I can provide for you, your mother doesn’t have money, you’re not going to be able to get clothes, you wont be able to get food, who knows what type of place you will be at, but here, you will have everything you need and want.
Q: Has there been physical abuse from him in the past?
A: Yes, there has on more than one occasion. And he’s done it in front of people. He did it in front of two of our producers on our show, Primetime Love … It’s so idiotic and its funny and its not funny. During the shooting of it, I have a very light personality, with that, there were a lot of parts that were just naturally funny and it just kinda happened. So he called shooting down and he called a meeting with myself and two producers from Los Angeles and we went to our back room where the sitting area is – he said “there has to be a good cop and a bad cop and there is only one comedian here and the comedian is me.” I just started laughing and said, “Oh my God you are ridiculous” and I say, “I can’t help it if I’m funnier than you”. Then he leaped across the table and grabbed my neck and squeezed it to the point that I thought that he poked a hole in my trachea. The two producers didn’t know what to do. They couldn’t get him off of me. They couldn’t do anything so I started kicking him in his groin. That’s the only thing that got him off of me … There were other times when he grabbed me and ripped jewelry … When he was verbally abusive, I didn’t recognize it as abuse. I took his nasty behavior as his personality, I just thought he was a really mean jerk. He was just rude to people because he’s rude to a lot more people than me.
More on the divorce and his alleged 19-year-old jumpoff...
Q: How long had your marriage been troubled before you learned that Deion filed for divorce
A: We were not on our way to get a divorce. We had spoken about it some time here and there but at that point we were not in a fight, we were not getting a divorce, we had just come from the Hall of Fame, we had just been on a road trip with seven charter buses with kids and families. It wasn’t that type of party whatsoever. Then one day, he meets me in the garage and gives me divorce papers. I say wow are you serious. He says, ‘you can have everything, I just want the house. You can have everything inside, you can have money, the kids, just leave me the house. I said wow, if that’s what you want to do. He gave me divorce papers in September but he never filed so it was a mind game… He says that he didn’t tell the media about the divorce in September and I believed him. He then tells the media that we are not getting a divorce.
Q: There have been online rumors that Deion was having an affair with a 19 year old woman and assisted by his friend Pac-Man Jones. Is there any truth to this?
A: A girl tweeted myself and someone else pictures of her in a hotel room with one hand on his back and tweeted text messages that had been exchanged. So I just happened to be on twitter that night and I saw it and I woke Deion up and asked, “is this you” and he said “yeah that’s me, that’s me but they must have photo-shopped that hand in there I don’t know who that is.” Im very calm and understanding, and probably too compassionate and said “o.k., you just got caught out there and you need to figure out what your story is because obviously you are not telling me the truth and I’m sure this is going to hit mainstream soon” and I kinda left. He never really got a reaction out of me. I got about six different stories and none of the stories ever matched. Time passes and I’m still at the house, still cooking dinner and we are at a football year-end banquet and he’s not there, I’m there with the children and people start coming up to me and asking me how I’m doing regarding the divorce. My reaction is ‘no, that’s old. That’s news from September. They said no he posted it on Facebook. I said ‘he doesn’t have a Facebook account, he hadn’t had one the entire time. To me that was very chic-like. Its very girlish. I’ve never known a man to do anything like that. A lot of little things he had been doing were female inspired.
Q: How did you learn of the alleged 19 year old mistress?
A: I found out that one of the mainstream media outlets said they were breaking a story about him cheating with this 18 year old girl and he said none of this is true, but one of the smaller African-American outlets had already gotten to it and proven it, but he said it doesn’t matter because we are going to get a divorce anyway and then it appeared on Facebook. I now realized that our divorce was the only story that could trump the story of his cheating with an 18 year old so he used that. After that, we was trying to get me out of the house by doing really nasty things like moving my stuff around in the house putting my things in the garage. Having kids come over and move my stuff. Anything you can think of that’s what he did.
Peep Pilar's recount of what went down last month...
Q: Please describe the violence that took place in your home on April 23, 2012.
A: “After Deion closed the door so I couldn’t see or talk to my son, he then opened it and jumped towards me in a taunting, frightening manner. I said, ‘what are you going to do?’ And he closes the door and I see him pushing (my son) into the closet area and closes that door. I cant see my son anymore and then he shuts the door on me. I call him a bitch. Then the door opens and he charges me like he’s running out of a tunnel on the football field – straight to my throat – completely off guard – drives and slams me into the glass double door by my neck. I’m kicking and scratching any where that I can get him off of my throat. I put my hand under his fingertips and I’m able to wiggle out of his choke. He picks me back up by my neck and throws me around … I’m screaming at the top of my lungs and now he’s rushing me into the bedroom – off of my feet – solely by my neck. He pulled me around the sitting area, I can’t breathe anymore … I grab the elbow of the statue with one arm and try to grab the double doors while he still has me. It’s very heavy, and I’m tipping it. With whatever bit of breathe and strength I have, I’m giving it all I got because I don’t have many more ‘gots’ left. He grabs the statue. I look at him like ‘you gotta be kidding me’ and I just cover my head and close my eyes and boom, boom, boom. He’s just hitting me with the statue and with his hands. He wasn’t doing a Superfly Snuka (the famous wrestler) over my head with the statue, he was just tipping, tipping it on my head … He lies and says he didn’t hit me or choke me and this is why I’m sitting here with a broken arm and a smashed thumb with a pin in it.”
Q: Where do you see yourself in the immediate future and five years down the road?
A: I have businesses and I’ve been working for a minute. I have a perfume line and a T-Shirt line and some savings but I’ve been using everything since September when he cut us off, and my family and some friends have helped me out. Moving forward, I want to work more in depth in TV and film for sure – acting and writing. It was something that I did before we were married. He knew that after the kids were older it was something I wanted to get back into. I have a business plan and I want it to grow with clothing, fragrances and beauty products. I want my children to see me grow an empire for them. A have a lot of fun things that I do with my daughter and my mother and my sister. Fun things that are passed down through generations – beauty and skin care secrets. Most importantly, I want to go further with my babies and their talents. They all play the piano and are musically inclined. I want them to experience great things and see the world. The divorce can’t happen soon enough for me.
Of course Deion denies all of these allegations, so....who do you believe????