Freaks: Slizzard Lab Tech Caught In University Locker Room With His Pants Down Surrounded By Monkeys

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Categories: Arrests, Freaks, News, Random Ridiculousness, Skanky, Slizzard, SMH, What the Hell???, What Were You Thinking?

Coley Mitchell

What the hell was HE doing?!?! The monkey was loose too! Or monkeys, rather.

No animals were harmed during Coley Mitchell’s one-man party in a science lab locker room.

Two monkeys were out of their cages when cops found Mitchell at Georgia Health Sciences University in Augusta last week, WJBF-TV reported, but veterinarians said they were fine.

Mitchell, however, was intoxicated and sitting in a chair with his pants down, according to a police report.

Cops said he was uncooperative and aggressive when they asked him to zip up and leave the lab.

The 32-year-old technician was charged with public drunkenness and booked into Richmond County Jail.

In a statement, GHSU spokesperson Jennifer Hilliard Scott said the school “does not condone behavior that conflicts with the research, education and clinical missions of the university, and employees are expected to conduct themselves, at all times, with integrity and respect.”

This guy is lucky. We’ve done a lot of “When Animals Attack” stories and he definitely could have ended up worse off — what with his vulnerable parts “exposed” and all. What happens when the monkey spanks you back, riiiight?

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