Kim “Captain Obvious” Kardashian Discovers Her Donk Is Too Big For Her Pants… And Admits “I Shouldn’t Be Giving Marriage Advice To Anyone!”

Kimmy Cakes had a few blonde moments this weekend. Chief among them had to be her V Magazine feature, where she tries to make an analogy between reality stardom and rap music.

Here’s the excerpt we found most interesting from her VMag story:

“It’s always funny to me when people say that I’m famous for being famous,” Kim says, frankly. “I think it’s fascinating, because it’s still entertainment, you know? It’s fun to see the progression of that idea. I don’t take offense to it at all. I’m not naïve to the fact that I’m not a singer or an actress or anything like that. I’ve never claimed to be anything that I’m not. I think [reality] is still a new form of entertainment that was kind of an unexpected thing.” Perhaps this sensibility, too, reflects the influence of Kanye. She offers a curious analogy: “It reminds me of rap music.”

“When rap music first came out, people were like, We don’t understand this, what is this, it’s just a fad. But rap music is definitely here to stay, and I think reality shows have proven they are as well. But when something is newer, people don’t really understand it.” As more television genres go the way of the analog tube, why shouldn’t there be room to explore the potential of a new family dynamic? “You can see that soap operas aren’t on the air as much anymore. I think reality shows are taking over that genre, but I think the draw to our show is that we are relatable. I get it all the time, people saying, ‘I don’t have any sisters, but you make me feel like I’m part of the family,’ or, ‘I have four sisters and it reminds me of you guys!’ I think it’s just a new world with social media. The interaction I have with my fans and the access is so much fun to me. I love that connection.”

When asked if she can see herself earning enough respect to one day be revered like television greats such as Lucille Ball or Susan Lucci, Kim grows impassioned. “I think there was a quote where somebody said that reality stars will never get a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. So, of course I’m so competitive that I think that it would be a huge achievement and a goal that anyone would want. I would love to break that mold.”

Good luck with that one. But we do have to applaud her ambition. She’s made a ton of cash letting cameras into her life after all.

Another part of the story we found pretty funny was when Kim makes an argument that she’s toned down her heavy makeup, hoochie get ups and weavy wonder locks for a more subtle approach:

While the media has speculated that the evolution of Kim’s look can be attributed to the influence of her new beau, she explains that its roots run deeper than that. “It came from me taking time away at the end of last year and the beginning of this year and really simplifying my life,” she says. “I went and stayed at my mom’s house for like four months, and I didn’t bring any makeup, high heels, or anything. I just brought sweats, workout clothes, and pajamas. It was so refreshing to me! Spending more time in Paris and traveling has broadened my fashion horizon and my palette of what I want to wear. I love makeup. I love the glitz and the glam, but I think there are just different ways to go about it now.” Still, she admits, there is a ’Ye factor. “Obviously having a stylish boyfriend who has helped introduce me to things and opened up my vision has been an inspiration and has helped me change it up a little bit and become more sophisticated. Being with him, designing and doing things, that’s been motivating to me and has taught me a lot. I’m just thankful.”

Another aspect of Kim’s new relationship is the mutual appreciation for respite from the public glare. “Before, I wouldn’t have valued privacy as much as I do now,” she says, alluding to her turbulent year. “I think anyone I’m in a relationship with can really appreciate the things I’ve gone through to bring me here, because I probably wouldn’t have fought for that privacy before. Being with someone who’s more private but who understands public life, we have an understanding. It’s a good balance.”

And last but not least, Kim covers ground about her upcoming role in Tyler Perry’s “The Marriage Counselor” and admits that she’s not someone who should be dishing out marital advice to anybody:

Whether or not Hollywood comes around, Kim is, apparently, coming to Hollywood. For her next feat, she’ll tackle a featured role in the upcoming Tyler Perry movie, The Marriage Counselor. Will acting for the screen really prove to be that different from simply living on it? “It’s a departure,” she says of her role as a therapist. “In real life, I’m definitely not a marriage counselor. I shouldn’t be giving marriage advice to anyone! It was pretty ironic, especially at the time that I was filming it, but it was therapeutic. It’s sort of my motto in life that I’ll try anything once that is outside my comfort zone, and if I don’t like it I won’t do it again. But acting, I liked.”

Well hopefully for Kim she can step her acting game up so people will stop saying she’s famous for nothing or for her butt. Speaking of which… You gotta hit the flip to peep the reality star showing off her cake game.

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