2013 is only 22 days old and everyone on this list is already having the worst year ever. Who knew you could squeeze a dead imaginary girlfriend, epic sports scandals and multiple arrests into three weeks? We didn’t, but it all happened, and it’s only January. Here are the ten celebs already having the worst 2013 ever. Take a look.
Chief Keef - The filth-smeared slime ball was sentenced to 60 days in juvey (probation violation), sued for $75,000 by show promoters (missed show) and sued AGAIN, days later, by a middle schooler for unpaid child support. All in 22 days. Worst January ever.
Manti Te’o - The “Lyin Hawaiian” is currently entangled in the creepiest sports scandal, maybe ever. To believe his story, you’d have to believe he’s a stone-cold nincompoop. Grade A, Level 10 idiot. Samoan God of stupidity. Either way, his once promising NFL Draft status is now a mystery.
Lance Armstrong - The disgraced sports hero went from “most celebrated athlete ever” to “most hated man in America” during his now infamous Oprah interview. Too proud to show remorse or emotion, Lance spoke like a broken man without a soul. Tragic.
Shawty Lo - The condom-allergic rapper-turnt-reality star was a victim of selective fake outrage by the same people who support equally demeaning reality TV. Sad? Ehh, but not worse than his arrest for unpaid child support soon after. Pray for L-O.
Kaylin Garcia - No one knew Budden’s basement-dwelling beauty had dusty dolphin teefs until she broke her silence on “Love & Hip-Hop: NY.” Dragged through Hell and back for hours on Twitter, her reason for existing seemed more unknown than ever. Photo credit: Twitter
Spike Lee - The iconic filmmaker behind classic Black cinema created widespread uproar with his anti-“Django Unchained” comments (without having seen the film) late last year. Once beloved by many, Spike shriveled into a bitter ’ole angry negro trapped in the past.
Blue Ivy - In 2012, she was the hottest baby in the game. All Blue Ivy everything. But now that Kim K’s pregnant, she’s completely irrelevant. Cold world.
Michelle Williams - She probably thought everyone would be excited to see her reunite with Beyonce and Kelly, but we weren’t, because she’ll always be “the other one in the group.”
Lupe Fiasco - Thrown off the stage for anti-Obama comments during an Inauguration performance, Lupe reminded everyone why he’s the most repulsive fake smart rapper alive.