Attention Slores: CBS Warns Stars — Please Cover Up Your Cakes, Racks, Schlongs And Cracks At The Grammy Awards!

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Pink, this means you’ll have to throw more than a few sparkles on your box this year, mkay? CBS isn’t trying to have any wardrobe malfunctions at this Sunday’s Grammy Awards and they’ve sent a memo to those they expect to attend to make sure they adhere to certain standards.

An insider who received the memo joked, “I assume that my lovely colleagues do not get this same email for the Oscars. And yes, this is a real email,” before texting the message to Deadline.com You can read the full copy below:

Date: February 5, 2013, 10:39:56 PM EST
Subject: 55th GRAMMYS: Standard And Practice Wardrobe Advisory

-kindly confirm receipt of s&p standards-

***GRAMMYS 2013***

CBS Program Practices advises that all talent appearing on camera please adhere to Network policy concerning wardrobe.

Please be sure that buttocks and female breasts are adequately covered. Thong type costumes are problematic. Please avoid exposing bare fleshy under curves of the buttocks and buttock crack. Bare sides or under curvature of the breasts is also problematic. Please avoid sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast ni**les. Please be sure the genital region is adequately covered so that there is no visible “puffy” bare skin exposure. Please avoid commercial identification of actual brand name products on T-shirts. Foreign language on wardrobe will need to be cleared. OBSCENITY OR PARTIALLY SEEN OBSCENITY ON WARDROBE IS UNACCEPTABLE FOR BROADCAST. This as well, pertains to audience members that appear on camera. Finally, The Network requests that any organized cause visibly spelled out on talent’s wardrobe be avoided. This would include lapel pins or any other form of accessory.

Who wants to make a bet Nicki Minaj, Pink, Lady Gaga, Fergie, Amber Rose, Beyoncé, Miley Cyrus and Rihanna ALL ignore this memo?

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