The last thing the world needs is a TLC biopic (starring Lil Mama as Left Eye) but that’s exactly what VH1 intends to force-feed viewers. Completely-unwanted and doomed, it’s already the worst idea in biopic history.
Here are ten reasons we don’t need a TLC biopic in 2013. Take a look.
TLC isn’t iconic enough for a biopic…yet
When you say TLC, most people think about Left Eye, Chilli’s perfectly-moist baby hair, “Waterfalls” and the worst recording contract (other than Toni Braxton’s) ever. 65 million albums sold? Yes, but they were never THAT compelling as a group.
…because the biopics we actually WANT to see haven’t be made (or completed) yet
The forever-delayed Jimi Hendrix biopic starring 3 Stacks has been “coming soon” for most of our lifetime (like “Detox”) but we get this microwave TLC biopic? Life’s not fair.
Lil Mama, KeKe Palmer and Drew Sidora as TLC = Worst idea ever
Kevin Hart as “Sisqo” in a Dru Hill biopic? THAT’s must-see TV. Not three random whatevers pretending to be TLC.
Lil Mama is too strong-faced and corny to play Left Eye
Left Eye was deeply-flawed and imperfect as TLC’s most popular member but never did anything horrible enough for her legacy to be disrespected like this. LIL MAMA, the stage crashing thirstball? Lisa Lopes doesn’t deserve this.
KeKe Palmer’s made-for-TV baby hair won’t be authentic
There’s no way to recreate Chilli’s legendary baby hair without KeKe Palmer looking completely ridiculous and silly in a movie we’re supposed to take seriously.
Drew Sidora is too worthless of an actress to play anyone
The gorgeous “actress” has the screen presence of a Ziploc bag full of rocks. If you watched “The Game,” you know she isn’t very good at acting, at all.
The streets don’t need TLC in 2013
Every platinum artist (and group) has their moment. TLC’s ended when Left Eye died. TLC x 2 Chainz collab? Left Eye holograms? Chilli and T-Boz solo album? Do. Not. Want.
VH1 will re-air the movie until everyone breaks down and watches it
BET proudly airing “Baby Boy” thousands of times a month without backlash makes the daily airing of this biopic inevitable.
Photo credit: Instagram
’90s groups don’t need inspiration for a comeback
What’s in the past should stay in the past or risk losing its classic luster…like New Edition when they signed to Bad Boy. SMH.
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