Dear Bossip: An Acquaintance I Used To Dance With Introduced Me To A Drug, But My Husband Doesn’t Know

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Categories: Dear Bossip, Love and Relationships, News, Sex and Relationships

Black woman dancer

Dear Bossip,

I’m happily married, it’s just that my husband doesn’t work and I provide for the home! I’ve never cheated and I never plan to.

However, my problem is that there was a most recent time when my husband was incarcerated and during that time I encountered an old friend of mine who I used to dance with, and I was reintroduced to a drug. I’d rather not say what it is, and now I’ve been secretly texting (my connect) to bring it to me behind my husband’s back! Please don’t judge me or be harsh but I love my husband and I value our marriage, but at the same time I feel like I’m in too deep and I don’t want to give it up! Please help me – Secretly Addicted

Dear Ms. Secretly Addicted,

Ow, somebody popped a Molly! And, now you hooked on that Molly! LMBAO!

Girl, you seriously write me and tell me about a drug problem you have, and you made a conscious choice to do the drug from the beginning, and you’re harboring this secret from your husband that you claim you’re happily married to, and you don’t want me to judge you or be harsh? Girl, back the “F” up out of my face with that bull-ish!

You truly are special!

So, you’re on drugs, have no plans on giving it up, and you want me to help you? Come on, sweetie! Really? Really!

What the hell is going on with you people? You write me asking for advice, but then tell me you’re not going to change, and then say, “Please help me.” I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. Why are you writing me if you’re not willing to do the work to change your behavior? Why are you asking me for advice when you already know the answer, and you answer your own damn foolish questions in your letters?

Lawd, I swear you ignoramus (look it up I don’t have time to explain it) grown folks with immature brains and underdeveloped minds wear me so thin. I truly don’t know where you want me to go with this letter, and with my answer.

But, here is the thing, boo boo, you need some help. Wait, hold up, why am I saying that. One thing I know about drug addicts is that unless you want help, and despite others wanting you to get off drugs, then no amount of pleading, crying, wishing, hoping, and putting you in rehab will make you stop. You have to want to stop on your own. And, you have stated that you don’t want to give it up. So, I want you to answer my question – What the “F” do you want me to say to you?

I do think it’s “F’d” up that you are doing it behind your husband’s back, and you claim to be happily married. Someone please explain to me if that is what a happy marriage is – deception, lies, and manipulation. If that is what your marriage is, and that is considered a happy marriage, then I don’t want it, and I’m sure other sane non-drug affected people do not want it.

I’m saddened that your friend you used to dance with is still a part of your life, and you consider them a friend when they have you hooked on drugs. Again, if that is what you consider a friend, then you truly have a warped sense of reality and what friendship and marriage is about. But, that could be the affects of the drug you’re on. That -ish got you delusion, dumb, and delirious.

Also, the real issue is that your husband is not working, and you’re taking care of the household. You have a resentment, and bitterness toward him not working and you’re going out and making the money. So, to relieve the stress and pressure you have resorted to a feel-good drug to help you avoid the real issue in your life. It’s truly sad that instead of talking with your husband and working with him to help him find employment, or he use his skillsets to build on something to bring some income into the home, you avoid the elephant in the room and begin using drugs. You can’t keep running from your problems, and using drugs to escape the reality of your life. It’s not healthy.

So, Ms. Crack-Head-Base-Head-Coke-Head-Pill-Popping-Trifling-A**, if you value your marriage and love your husband, then get some help. Talk with your husband and be honest with him. It’s unfair to him regardless if he is working or not, and if you provide for the home. That’s what a marriage is about – “For better or for worse.” UGH! You people don’t need to be married if you can’t handle the bad times, and you want it to be good all the damn time. Oooohhhh! I want to call you every name in the book, but I’m refraining and biting my tongue.

But, if you don’t stop just know that you will begin to steal, trick, and do whatever you need to get your fix. And, when you’re too far gone, you won’t have anyone to blame but yourself, but of course you know the consequences.  And, we all know how this story is going to end. You will be back on the pole (Bands a make her dance), twerking and popping it just so you can continue getting your fix. Ma’am, you will be back in the very place you left because your so-called friend introduced you to some drug you don’t want to stop using. SMDH! I want you to know that you consciously got on drugs, so you consciously know you’re going to be a fiend from here on out. Damn! I feel sorry for your husband. He sticking his penis in drug coochie! Just nasty. –Terrance Dean

Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below!

Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean: loveandrelationships@bossip.com

Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter: @terrancedean

“LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook, click  HERE!

author terrance dean

Make sure to order my books Mogul: A Novel (Atria Books – June 2011; $15); Hiding In Hip Hop (Atria Books – June 2008); and Straight From Your Gay Best Friend – The Straight Up Truth About Relationships, Love, And Having A Fabulous Life (Agate/Bolden Books – November 2010; $15). They are available in bookstores everywhere, and on Amazon, click HERE!

Mogul     Hiding In Hip-Hop cover     Straight From Your Gay Best Friend

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