Posted by Bossip Staff
Bossip recently sat down with Musiq, the only dude who could write 439 songs about love, and you feel them all. Being that
Hallmark holiday Valentine’s Day is coming up, we figured we’d give you lovebirds and cynics some dialogue:
Bossip: Sex and Love…..the same thing?
Musiq: Sex and love are two different things. I think that, mostly women, no offense, have a challenging time in separating the two. This is not a negative critique, just an observation that I’ve made. Women tend to become more emotionally involved with someone once sex if factored in, whereas with a dude, not to say that we don’t have any emotions, but it’s just easier for us to separate the two. Sex is just sex to us usually. You could get all deep with it and say that it’s scientific and it’s just natural selection; we’re depositing something, and y’all are receiving something. The fact that y’all are receivers and you all are so sensitive, that it comes with its side effects. So many times I talk to girls and they be like, ‘Yo, I just be feeling a certain way and I can’t really explain why, I’m just emotional right now. It could be because of a number of things. An accumulative process of things that happen during the week or all your life. So, I don’t think that it’s possible to ever really fully understand a woman’s process, because it’s always changing. Whereas with a dude, you’d be surprised at how simple we are. Usually, whatever we’re going after, whatever it looks like….that’s what it is.
When you want to talk about spending your life with somebody, you need a whole lot more than that. When you tired of looking at that person, there’s gotta be something else there that says, you know what…you lucky I love yo ass, cause I wouldn’t deal with this. I think that it would help if people, not women, but people would understand that there is a huge huge huge difference between sex and love. Sex doesn’t confirm the presence of love, it just means that you’re sexually attracted to a person. I don’t have to have sex with a person to know that I love them.
Bossip: The lyrics in your songs seem like you take them directly from life experiences. True?
Musiq: For so long in Black music or urban music, this idea has been perpetuated that relationships are supposed to be a certain way. It’s not entirely untrue, there’s just more things that should be taken into consideration. In the songs that I write I like to contribute a realistic perspective of things that go on in relationships. You say you love me…but how? You say you like me…but in what way? I’m telling you that I want to be with you…but for what reason? The thing that I’ve learned about us as people is that when it comes to love… It’s not that it’s impossible, but it’s challenging to be unconditional. Because we as human beings we care about ourselves more than anything else. Whether we want to admit to that or not, it’s a reality.
I found myself in relationships saying okay I could be the stereotype, I could be a statistic. The stereotypical dude about whatever, but I’m going to choose to be the exception. But, sometimes I do end up being the statistic.
Bossip: In what way?
Musiq: You know, always thinking about sex. Hollering at a girl because you trying to get some. Wanting a girl to be around me because you like the way that she looks and thinking about what people are gonna say about her being with me. Despite all of the I still try to be the exception and rise above that. A lot of girls ask me, do you mean the stuff that say in those songs. Yeah, I’m that person, but a lot of it is me giving myself something to live up to. Most of the songs that I have, they stem from me actually going through that.
Bossip: Is romance dead?
Musiq: The idea of romance was always on some fairytale stuff. The candles and the roses and the chivalry. Not to say that there’s anything wrong with it, but the idea, the image, what was portrayed as being romantic…they’re just not working anymore for the different generations. We’ve gained better perspective and we see through that. ‘Oh, so you think that just cause you got me some roses, it’s gon’ make everything better.’ You know what I’m saying? For a dude it’s like, ‘Oh, so just because you gave me some tonight, I’m just gon’ forget about everything.’ Like, no. We have the experiences of the past to use as a point of reference. We’re like a fool-proof generation now. I think that the idea of romance is in the element of being spontaneous. That spontaneity is going to come from how you organically feel about a person. We’re running out of room to run game, because everybody’s already put on to the game now.
So, is the short, mo-hawked man right?
Click Here to listen to Musiq’s “Sobeautiful”. Video coming soon…