Dear Bossip: He Hired His Ex To Work For Him & He's Talking About Taking A Trip With Her & He Also Called Her Babe

Dear Bossip,

I have been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for almost a year.

He has his own business and he recently hired a women whom he had past relations with about 6 years ago, although they never had sex, they were still more than friends

Ever since he told me about her working with him I felt uneasy about it, but I thought she is helping his company and I should trust him. More recently, he has begun talking about going on trips with her, and she has been the stem of most of our arguments. I always end up looking insecure because he is always telling me that nothing is going on. Even the girl has reached out to me and said they are strictly friends and nothing is going on.

Recently, over the weekend, we were in the car and he was speaking with her on the phone and he called her babe multiple times. Immediately after they hung up an argument began and he kept apologizing stating, “It was an accident. I am sorry. Please for me,” Blah Blah Blah. At this point I am furious and ready to end the relationship what should I do? – Very Uncomfortable

Dear Ms. Very Uncomfortable,

End it. End it. End it.

Out of all the people in the entire world he could have hired to work for him as he started his own business, he hires someone whom he had a previous relationship with, though they did not have sex. Uh uh! No ma’am! And, he is on the phone calling her “Babe.” But, when you confronted him about it he tells you that it was accident. Uhm, how is that an accident? Once is an accident, but several times?!?!?! Oh, hell no! Something is going on!

Chile, if he is calling you babe, and he is calling her babe, then what does babe mean when he says it to her? What other pet names or other “accidents” is he saying or doing when you’re not around?

End it. End it. End it.

Here’s the thing, she called you to let you know that there is nothing going on between them, however, when he called her babe, then she should have corrected him and put him in his place. She should have nipped that in the bud, and let him know that their working relationship is strictly a professional one. However, the fact that she didn’t correct him let’s me know she enjoys his attention, and affection toward her. She knows she can “get that” if she wanted to. Watch her. She is laying in your backyard plotting and planning.

But, let me get this straight, he hires her to work for him, which means that he and her have been in communication since you’ve been dating him, and they were always in contact with each other even after their break up. Therefore, when you began dating him did he tell you about her? Did he tell you about this woman whom he was friends with despite them having a past, and was he forthright in telling you that they remain in contact with each other? Were you aware he was keeping communication with any of his exes?

If all of your arguments are about her, and he has not done anything to appease you or to acknowledge your feelings about this, then he doesn’t respect you. If this man loves you, and he wants to make sure that you are happy, then he would make sure you are happy at home, and he respects your wishes, desires, and feelings. He would not have you speculating or worried about another woman because he wouldn’t put you in this uncompromising situation from the beginning.

I’m sure he put her up to call you and to tell you that nothing is going on between them. And, there may very well be nothing going on. If, after six years they had not reconnected or rekindled their relationship, and he was sincere in hiring her for her expertise or talents to help him with his business….well, scratch that…six years ago they dated, but didn’t have sex, uhm, there is an open door that is about to be closed. So, if your instincts are telling you otherwise, then listen to your instincts. Out of the blue this woman he’s had a previous relationship with shows up working for him, and you’re supposed to be like, “Oh, okay, cool. I have no need to be worried because you all didn’t have sex, so there is no possible way you two will have sex now because you’re in a relationship.” (Giving you, him, and her the side eye)

But, err uhm, he is talking about going on trips with her. Really? Business trips for them to do what? Is she his only employee? Is she the vice-president of his company, or director of marketing, or sales? Where are they taking a trip to, and can she SKYPE in? Does she need to be present for these trips? Honey, you need to be asking all types of questions. The hell is really going on?!?! He is taking trips with an ex who now works for him, and he calls her babe on the phone! Miss me, and that yellow bus he riding. Get off at the next stop. Don’t stay on that bus.

If this makes you uncomfortable, then say something. Talk with him about your feelings, how it makes you feel uncomfortable, and the fact that you don’t appreciate him calling her babe. You don’t like that they are going on a trip together, and you don’t feel comfortable with them being alone together, working together, or that they are even in contact with each other. If you don’t say anything, then you will continue to argue, and fight over this, and he will continue to not do anything because he doesn’t see anything wrong in what he’s doing. You let him know what you are willing to put up with, and that he needs to handle the situation, and make a choice. He needs to respect you, your feelings, and your relationship. If he can’t do this, then you will know what to do. LEAVE HIM. – Terrance Dean

Hey Bossip Fam, what do you think? Share your opinions and thoughts below! Also, e-mail all your questions Terrance Dean:  loveandrelationships@bossip.com Follow Terrance Dean on Twitter: @terrancedean and “LIKE” Terrance Dean on Facebook, click  HERE!