Light Skinned Writer Says Dark Black Women Are Harder To Befriend
What’s the problem with Black women? A light-skinned writer by the name of Kim Lute seems to have all the answers apparently. The writer recently wrote about her experiences being of the lighter complexion and tackles the politically incorrect conversation that it has in our nation.
Via HuffPo reports:
Welcome to the plight of the light African American woman navigating the “darker the berry the sweeter the juice” cosmos, where mere physical differences (fine hair to thicker locks and thin lips to billowy pouts) serve as the basis for generational division. Sadly, I recently learned that these divisive lines, created generations ago, remain frustratingly in place.
In all fairness, this “mulatto” (which technically I am not) has led a far easier life simply because I lack darkness. The unwritten rule is that the darkest women are the most burdened while lighter black women are, I suppose, damned to “house Negro problems” that equate to mere hiccups in days that are perpetually long with happiness, job promotions and our pick of viable suitors. Dark or light, black women are long overdue to finally own up to our deep-rooted resentment toward one another. No, I may not have lost out on a promotion, but when I walk into a room I am still deemed an “other.” It’s not clear to most to what extent I am unlike the majority, but it’s enough to ensure my piece of the American pie is unfairly smaller than non-blacks.
Allow me to join an already uncomfortable conversation. I’m going out of my cotton-picking mind trying to convince my darker sisters that I’m not their competitor, and that loving who I am, and what I look like, isn’t a condemnation of darker women. If I’ve made great strides in my career it is because I’ve faltered, failed and tried again, ad nauseam. But is also because society finds me less threatening. I do not believe I’m prettier than any other woman, and know that my finest qualities have nothing to do with my “funny-colored eyes” or “fine hair.” I’m saddened that we have imposed a self-defeating value system based mainly on our exterior differences. And contrary to certain beliefs, I too have experienced the most blatant racists insults, perhaps more so than others because I’m a writer who targets her subjects indiscriminately. Don’t let this “light, damn near white” complexion fool you.
Kim goes onto detail her experiences in Atlanta and claims that she has an easier time befriending white women because Black women tend to be more negative towards one another…
As a journalist, author and the designated “light girl” in my coterie, I’m frankly “Fanny Lou-Hamer tired” of the nitpicking among black women. Since moving to Atlanta in the millennia, I’ve befriended mostly white women. Why? The unvarnished truth lies somewhere between my own emotional hang-ups and the fact that most of the darker black women I’ve met are competitive, strident, pushy and critical of my decisions. As such, it’s been easier to socialize with those women who value my friendship without stipulations and constant backtalk. Thus, my friendships with white women are neat, unfettered and based solely on our likes and dislikes. And instead of forcing my friendship on black women who want nothing to do with me, I’ve allowed my other relationships to develop organically even if it meant there was a glaring absence of color that would cause my ancestral foremothers to spin in their unmarked graves.
So why is it so hard for some black women (myself very much included) to foster and gain positive long-term friendships with each other? The initial response would be petty jealousy, arrogance and confrontational behavior, systemic roadblocks that were put in place long before this generation was born. The whole truth, I suspect, harkens back to slavery, in which blacks as a whole were forcibly pitted against one another; no group more so than black women. Lighter mothers, daughters and sisters were given an unfair, unjust and amoral advantage over so-called jezebels, mammies and jigaboos which fostered disheartening prejudices that continue to stain and cripple our modern day relationships.
You can read Kim’s entire piece HERE and share your thoughts on her piece below in our comments section.