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Kanye West Addresses Illuminati Rumors

For years Kanye West and a number of his musical friends have been accused of being members of the Illuminati, a powerful Satan-loving sect who secretly push a devilish agenda delivered through music. In his self-penned cover story for Paper Magazine Ye finally shuts those rumors down:

I heard a comment — a joke — about the Tidal press conference being an Illuminati moment. If there was actually an Illuminati, it would be more like the energy companies. Not celebrities that gave their life to music and who are pinpointed as decoys for people who really run the world. I’m tired of people pinpointing musicians as the Illuminati. That’s ridiculous. We don’t run anything; we’re celebrities. We’re the face of brands. We have to compromise what we say in lyrics so we don’t lose money on a contract. Madonna is in her 50s and gave everything she had to go up on an award show and get choked by her cape. She’s judged for who she adopts. F**k all of this sensationalism. We gave you our lives. We gave you our hearts. We gave you our opinions!

At least he’s not so uptight that he didn’t understand we were just making a joke about Tidal being an Illuminati moment!

Well there you have it folks. Are you buying it?

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