I am a 26 year old probation officer, and I am engaged to a 30 year old Uber driver.
I love my fiancé, but I must admit that I have a wandering eye. My wandering eye is due to my fiancé’s ongoing erectile dysfunction issue that he’s had since we met. He has a very small penis and he has issues performing. I stay with him because he loves me unconditionally and bends over backwards for me.
Obviously, I can’t have a sexless relationship and still keep my sanity. So, I slept with 2 guys and a girl I met on Craigslist before we got engaged. After our engagement I vowed to never cheat again. I’m struggling to keep my word. There’s a fine a** stud at my job that makes my lady region wet every time I see her. The chemistry in the air is obvious. When we see each other we go out of our way to talk to one another and flirt a little. There are always too many people around for us to talk privately (though she invited me to “show her something in the closet” once, but it would have been too obvious to our co-workers what was going on).
I found her on Facebook and I want to friend her, but I don’t want to come on too strong since she hasn’t told me outright that she likes me, nor has she tried to make a move that would clarify things. What should I do? I love my fiancé, but my lady region gets wet for my co-worker every time I see her. When I play with my toy I fantasize about her and I want to taste her.
Please help! – Bisexual Freak
Dear Ms. Bisexual Freak,
Ma’am, you don’t love your fiancé. You do not respect him, nor do you care about him. If you did, then you would be honest about your feelings, and you wouldn’t go through with this bogus engagement and potentially bogus marriage.
Why are you bringing this man into your drama and your mess? He doesn’t deserve what you are doing to him, and it doesn’t matter if he has an erectile dysfunction, or a small penis. Considering that you know all of this and are aware of this issue, then why continue or pursue a relationship if you are not sexually satisfied? You claim this man loves you and bends over backwards for you, but you do not love him, and nor are you bending over backwards for him. You are selfish, trifling, and quite frankly you are trash.
You’ve already cheated on him prior to getting engaged. Now, you’re disrespecting him and your relationship by flirting with a stud at work. Why are you doing this to him and yourself? What are you getting out of this? Really, what do you wish to accomplish? Your behavior is childish and immature. There is no reason you should be engaged if you don’t love someone, and you are not sexually satisfied. You are doing nothing but hurting him, your relationship, and yourself. If you loved yourself then you would not be doing this to him or to yourself.
And, if you are bisexual, then he needs to know this. He should not be left in the dark about your sexuality, and who you are. You are not going to be satisfied in your marriage because you will always desire and yearn for the same sex. You will constantly be going back and forth wanting to be sexually fulfilled by someone other than your husband. What’s going to happen when you need some female attention and loving? What are you going to do when you want a woman’s touch, a woman’s feel, and a woman’s body? How are you going to reconcile this in your marriage to a man? You are playing a dangerous game, especially with someone else’s feelings and emotions. If the shoe were on the other foot, and he was not sexually satisfied with you, and he was out cheating and sleeping around, then you would be all up in your feelings about how he is such a dog and he doesn’t respect you as a woman.
You really are the worst. And, what’s sad is that you are throwing yourself at a co-worker, a stud, someone who asked you to go into a closet and “show her something.” Are you freaking 12 years old? You’re asking me if you should send her a Facebook friend request, and pursue her because she really hasn’t given you any indication that she wants you or may be interested. Huh? Girl, you are really slow in the head. Grow up and stop these childish shenanigans. One, don’t sleep with or ever engage with a co-worker. Don’t –ish where you work. Two, you’re cheating. Flirting with someone is cheating. The next step will involve actual cheating. Instead, how about you be honest with your fiancé, and tell him the truth. You don’t want to be married to him. You don’t love him. You don’t care about anyone but yourself. And, you are a freak. He does not satisfy you, and marrying him will not resolve your issue. Grow up. Stop acting like you’re a teenager. It’s time to be responsible for yourself, your actions, and your behavior. – Terrance Dean
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