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Good day, Bossip readers! Let’s talk sex! Sex and sexuality have been a part of society and cultures around the world since the beginning of time. With the passing of time, naturally, evolution is to be expected, but some things never change as adage states, “there is nothing new under the sun” including man and woman’s natural desire for sexual pleasure.

Now, in ancient times sex was more than just an hour of sweaty romping that ends with two breathless bodies, one of which is sure to fall asleep within minutes. Keep in mind sex in the U.S. lasts a total of 17 minutes on average. But think about it, Kama Sutra and Tantric sex were created thousands of year ago by people who had no technological distractions. There was no Sports Center to turn on after a session, no Play Stations, no internet, so what did they do at night for hours at a time? You already know. But sex, in those times, was intimate and mediative, a spiritual experience each and every time. It was about connecting with your partner on another plane and transcending beyond the flesh. This was a process that took hours which resulted in explosive orgasms … together. Did you know that tantric practitioners believe that male ejaculation was to be controlled in order to experience multiple orgasms? They were all about a heightened sense of sexual energy!

The word tantra means “to weave together” and/or “to expand” so with that in mind, let’s apply these ancient practices to modern sexuality! Take a look at a few of these tantric tips to enhance your sexual experience with your loved one!

Quick Tip: tantric techniques are all about control. Practitioners believe that male ejaculation is draining, so the point is to learn to control ejaculatory urges by understanding the flow of your sexual energy. You must take your time and be as relaxed and comfortable as possible.

Breath Control – this is by far the most essential tool of tantric practice. Practice breathing steady and resist the urge to pant. When you’re huffing or holding your breath, you climax quicker. But to enhance your arousal, breathe slow and deep. When two people inhale and exhale on the same beat at the same time, it connects the two on a deeper level and will take your lovemaking to unimaginable heights. Relaxation is key!

Testicle Tweak – fellas, when you feel like you’re about to let loose, pull your testicles down and away from your body. You can practice this in your private moments alone with yourself or while you’re with your lady, she can do the honors if you’re willing. The idea is to learn how to feel pleasure without ejaculating.

Tip Compression – to maintain and prolong your erection, gently squeeze just below the tip of the penis. Explore this technique because every body is different so the pressure point may by a little above or below the tip. Again, have your lady help you find the spot. This is also good because women can learn the pleasure zones that are specific to her man.

Carefully Choose Position Variations – position changes can make or break your ability to control ejaculation so to make it last, chose wisely. Tantric practices use position switch to create a new escalation of sexual pleasure with the change of rhythm and sensation in order to overcome the urge to climax. This is a good way to find positions that are unique to you and your lover.

Be One – the whole point of these practices is to enhance intimacy with your partner and connect on a more spiritual level. The union of body, mind and soul with your lover. This will inevitably bring you closer as a unit and solidify your trust with one another.

So try something new and have fun getting to know your partner on another level!

Remember to e-mail your topic suggestions, questions and feedback to loveandrelationships@bossip.com!

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