Dhani Jones’ Crazy List For His Ideal Woman… All You Pocahontas Hoes Can Sit Down, He Don’t Want No Weavy Wonder

- By Bossip Staff

Dhani Jones hasn’t had a girlfriend in a minute, and when we heard his list of qualities he’s looking for in a lady, we understood why!!! This muhfugga puts Chilli’s requirements to shame. Not only does his woman have to put it down in the kitchen, she’s also gotta be multi-lingual and adventurous enough to go rough it with the Travel Channel star. And that’s not even the half of it!!! Pop the hood for the list.

Dhani Jones went on Shade 45 “The Morning After With Angela Yee” to talk about the new season of his Travel Channel show “Dhani Jones Tackles The Globe” where he participates in national pastimes around the world such as a strongman competition in Iceland, and cricket in Jamaica and while he was there he admitted that he’s been single for awhile and he keeps a LIST of qualities he’s looking for in a woman. She’s gotta have at least 75% of the list for him to even consider her:

Here’s Dhani’s List:
quick-witted, yet possesses a calming motherly quality
speaks languages
tall, slender (but she can be a little bit thicker)
from a great background
Exotic, maybe light brown/olive complected/mixed background
huge heart
creative soul
stands firm behind her man (but not in front, perhaps beside)
long hair
no weave
incredible hands
insatiable eyes
wants a huge family
can talk to a homeless person or a wealthy person
she can play in the mud in the morning and go to a black tie event at night
she’s ok on her own but she loves her man
independently wealthy helps

WOW… anybody think he may end up a bachelor for life???

Think we’re gonna take a pass on Dhani. He strikes us as the kind of guy that’d give you a hemp bracelet instead of jewelry from Cartier as an anniversary present anyway.


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  • http:chokolatemilk.blogspot.com Choco

    Good for him and better for me not even interested in him or what he likes!

  • http://stewartsynopsis.com/Site%20Index.htm We "Blacks" Are The REAL Hebrew Israelites

    On my list is the absence of beady-bead chest hair, Dhani.

  • you're not too bright

    he’s not REALLY looking for a woman…

    he’s looking for a reality show.


  • http://topratedstylist.wordpress.com topratedstylist

    Oh… she must be light brown or olive skinned tone…and he’s black as hell. GTFOH!!! Dark skinned men HATE the reflections that they see when they look in the mirror. Pathetic.

  • Soul Man


  • Felicia

    I think this deserves a “HO, SIT DOWN!”.

  • advice

    S e e k i n g A f f l u e n t c O m is a place for like-minded people who understand that intelligence, success and drive are key elements to attraction.

  • drenk

    I like his show on the travel channel

  • AK511

    Wow…I am the one for him. Who knew?
    Only thing I take issue with is the “wants a huge family”.
    I don’t know nothin bout birthin no babies!

  • Allen

    Self hate at its worst…

  • Mekkah

    How old is he…smh

  • carmen

    all them n*gga naps he got on his head and chest and he talkin bout he wants a woman with long nice hair. how bout you lead by example.

  • Come On People

    What qualifies as mixed race? you know you can be of mixed race and still be darkskinned and nappy hair. He says that he wants a woman that is educated but why is his list of qualification a source of ingorance?

  • Jamillah

    Good luck to him.

  • Soul Touch

    Don’t know who this dude is, but I thought I would go through the list anyhow.

    EVERYTHING was a check except for “Exotic, maybe light brown/olive complected/mixed background”. Sorry, full black Jamaican sister here. Too bad for you, bruh.

    Oh, and I’m not wealthy…but I handle my own…own a home, own a car, great credit…great friends, family and values…makes my weathly in my own right.


  • http:chokolatemilk.blogspot.com Choco

    Yeah from the looks of his stomach hair I can see why he wants long hair and by the complexion of the women he wants they must LSLH-he’s gross!

  • Carla

    This dude is afrocentric as much as afrocentric can be, from his name to his skin to his nappy a.s.s chest hair and I’m just wondering what he has against his own?

  • sissy

    now see i use to think he was cute until i read this foolishness. just pure foolish & he’ll never find all that in his life time.

  • Morpheus

    He’s probably gay.

  • WhatAWorld08

    And out of all these things, how many of the qualities does he possess.

    People like him and Chilli need to be shipped to their own perfect island,where their shortcomings and flaws are never discussed…….FREAKS!

  • How come you can't think

    His chest looks like mountain ranges on a map, he has ‘Paul D’ hair and he doesn’t look like he has anything to match what he’s asking for.

    Like those dudes that don’t want to work but want to be the man of the house, that’s how he looks in relation to his requests…

  • http:chokolatemilk.blogspot.com Choco

    He lacks grooming look at his own hair(s)

  • http://twitter.com/thugpundit Clarkekent3000

    Wow! Look at the hypocritical statements! Black women shouldn’t have to settle and neither should he! Right,ladies?

  • http:chokolatemilk.blogspot.com Choco

    You just said it best-black women don’t have to settle – what woman is going to settle for him!

  • DBinDC

    he needs to add “full frontal taco meat friendly” to his list.. cause i can just feel my delicate skin getting scracthed up by the brillo pad growing on the front of his body..

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