Dear Bossip I have a problem that I can’t talk to anyone close to me about. I’ve been sleeping with my cousin’s husband for 9 months and I don’t know what to do. I know that I’m wrong and deceitful and will probably go to hell for it but I want this to stop now. In the beginning I thought I was justified because she does treat him like sh*t and talk to him like a child. I thought I was showing him how he should be loved. I have some very nasty ways about me and I’m working hard to fix them. I’ve been going to church and I know it sounds corny but I’ve been saved and when I finally gave my life to Jesus I cried and I cried fro days because I’ve been living a lie for so long. I will be honest I did sleep with him twice since my salvation but I can’t do this anymore. I don’t know how to stop it because he’s always calling me and texting and if he can’t reach me he’ll just show up to my house!!! I want this to stop and it will stop but how do I live with this secret because I refuse to break up a happy home. I’m in desperate need of advice! Please help!
Good day to you, sis! Thank you for writing in and sharing your story. You’ve got a very triangular situation going down and one party (your cousin), obviously, has no idea that you’ve been sleeping with her husband. Thankfully, through the help of your fellowship and God, you’ve come to realize the errors in your ways and you want to correct them. However, once you get right with the Man above, please know that the work has just begun! Temptation will become greater and you will be met with many challenges making it more difficult to stay on a righteous path. Sooo, when it comes to you sexing up your cousin’s husband, tell him “NO,” for starters, followed by “I won’t be seeing you anymore.” If he shows up to your house, don’t answer! Change your number. After so many attempts he’s sure to get the point and move on. If you truly want this to stop, it will.
As you venture deeper into your spiritual quest, you will learn that everything that is done in the dark will come to light, it’s inevitable truth! So, the fact that you’re willing to cleanse yourself, your spirit and your ways but continue to keep your affair with your cousin’s husband a secret is counterproductive, no? But again, there’s the power of choice that we have as individuals, it’s beautiful and beastly all at the same time. So you should choose to never sleep with him again. Choose not to participate in sneaking around and sleeping with a married man. Make better life decisions! Make the decision and stand by it because, from what you’ve written, it seems you’ve got a weakness for this man – your cousin’s husband.
There is no easy way to part from these types of situations because someone always ends up getting hurt and in some cases, unfortunately, families are torn apart. These are the results poor decision making and so many people suffer when you act out of lust and selfishness. We all fall prey to those thoughts and desires and as hard as it may be to resist indulging, more than likely it’s the most responsible thing to do. Ma, things will unfold in time but right now you should stay in prayer, leave that man alone and work on you! But you must stop doing what you’re doing. You’d be surprised how well the word “no” works. Just say no, ma! Just say no.
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