Five Funny Lies Women Tell Men

- By Bossip Staff

“Who the biggest liars, men or women? Women are the biggest liars! Look at you, all of you. All of you are liars! Masters of the lie- the visual lie. Look at you. You got on heels- you ain’t that tall. You got on makeup, your face don’t look like that. You got a weave- your hair ain’t that long. You got a Wonderbra on- your titties ain’t that big. Everything about YOU is a lie, and you expect me to tell the truth?!? Fawk you!” – Chris Rock

Ah ladies! We always get on the fellas for lying. But let’s be real- we lie too. And though many of us ladies do strive to be honest and forthright, sometimes we get put in positions where we’d rather not tell the truth- at least not at that exact moment in time. So what do we do? Sometime we (gasp) lie. But in our defense, they’re mostly little white lies, half-truths. So nobody’s really getting hurt. And though I have to agree with Chris Rock that we women are masters of the visual lie- I actually like to call it the “beautiful illusion.” Personally I still think men are the biggest liars. But maybe that’s just because I’m a woman and choose to stay loyal to the sisterhood.

Here are 5 funny and sometimes obvious lies we women tell men.

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  • We"Blacks"AreTheREALHebrewIsraelites

    6. No, I TOTALLY like your mom.

    7. Of course, it’s a normal size! Trust me…

    8. Nah, I don’t mind if you tag along on Girl’s Night Out.

    😛 Just kidding guys!

    • WithAllHonesty

      9.Yeah,it’s yours.
      LMAO JK (well sorta)

  • Sa.s.sy24

    never lied about my weight, and never gave a guy i wasn’t interested in my number. If he kept being persistant he got his feelings hurt period.

  • veus

    How about: “Oh no, not tonight. I have a yeast infection! Give it a few days.” I have used this one a few times after tiring shifts in the er. I’m sure other ladies have too!!!

  • IceT

    Women are big azz liars by nature.It’s just the way they are,thats why i always compaired women to whitemen.Because they are the biggest freakin liars in the world.

  • I Am Legend ( Allergic To Darkies)

    You are the father

  • kami

    U a BEAST!

    I love you.

    I love it.

    You look good in that.

    I can tell you went to the gym.


    Sure I’ll call you..LOL
    Yes, I came too…LOL
    Don’t worry, size isn’t important, woman just want a good man..LOL, LMAO, CTFU, CMMCTSISF (Calling my mom cause the s^^^ is so funny).
    That was the best I ever had..LOL

    I wasn’t laughing at you, I was thinking about a joke I heard earlier.

    I wish I could spend more time with you (something you say to a guy once you find out he’s only working with four inches)..LOL

  • kerry (is eating red hots with flip flaps on)

    My toenails aren’t yellow–that’s nail polish! (maybe that’s just the lie I tell).

    • Mally MAL

      LMAO!!I’m damn near fell out my chair on that one!

  • he knows your lying

    It was on sale

    Honey loan me money and I will pay you back

    I really like basketball

    Your family is nice

  • team nymphis

    I got Indian in my family

  • keebler mf elf

    “I’m on birth control and I don’t want kids!”

  • I am a believer!

    I didnt get your text…(I have AT&T)
    I also email…..(I have an AT&T plan)
    Did you hear what I just said ( (yawning) I’m feeling sleepy now)
    Want to go for a drink this weekend (I’m babysitting my niece). How about next week? (I already made plans) This Tuesday? (Too far ahead to plan?

  • Aubrey

    1. Sometimes. So what I am not satisfied if hes not
    2. I don’t date men like that and never have, fools are crazy out here.
    3. I am fine really means leave me alone and I will come talk to you when I am better.
    4. No I don’t lie about that sorry. I am 112 pounds shut up.
    5. That’s true I only did it with one person.

  • Jhen

    Both lie equally.

    Get ur FREE exclusive mixtape downloads at

  • WithAllHonesty

    6.I could care less.
    7.That’s my cousin.
    8.He’s like my little brother.
    9.The money and the gifts doesn’t mean anything.
    10.I’m on the pill.

  • YokoDMV

    1. your come tastes good
    2. i was sleep
    3. i known him since high school
    4. its not that crooked
    5. i’m not sure i want to get married

    • Tony Redds

      U a lil freak huh?

    • YokoDMV

      LOL. for my man. no shame in mine 🙂

  • Dilla

    @ We”Blacks”AreTheREALHebrewIsraelites,
    Lmbo, priceless!!!

  • MsBossip

    bossip stays with da exclusive! NICKI MINAJ SEX TAPE LEAKED!! WWW.LOOT6.COM

  • Tony Redds

    I’m guilty of #1 my damn self..

  • Tony Redds


    Mmm Hmm…lol

  • tommykimon

    The comments on this are too funny. I can only think of one.
    “You’re the best I ever had”

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