Dear Bossip: I Was Wrong, I Cheated but She Won’t Take Me Back

- By Bossip Staff

I know I was wrong. I cheated on my lady of 3 years but I want her back and she won’t have me. I know that what I did was wrong and I’ve apologized over and over but she’s not hearing me. At first she was answering my calls and now she sends me to voicemail. I realize now that what I did was wrong and I want to seriously commit myself to this relationship because I know I can be all the man she needs but I need the chance to show her. I know that she’s hurt by my actions and the person I cheated with (they know each other) and the way she found out was really foul but I’m man enough to drop my pride and take the blame for all of it. I know her friends who don’t have a man have been in her ear and have probably convinced her to shut me out but I can’t get through to her. We’re both in our late 20’s and it’s time to settle down and I want to marry her! How do I get her back? All answers are welcomed. Thank you

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Comments

  • goin deeper

    ummmmm u F’ed up dude. Move on and learn from ur mistake.

    • Cam

      I see a lot of you women on this site don’t believe in forgiveness. Help this brotha out, and give him some advise on how to win his woman back. A lot of the negative comment here are cognitive with the image being featured above, and not relating to what this man is going through. have a heart, and help him out.

    • Rob

      co-sign@Cam

      All these many negative comments to a man who has admitted hes wrong n wants his lady back.damn shame.

    • Cam

      @Rob Thank you. I’m glad someone can see it my way.

      But I would suggest that this man TAKE ACTION. Get off the computer, phone whatever, and go see this woman if you care that much about her. You speak of marriage, and wanting to settle down, and being all the man she needs. There’s nothing like a face to face. She needs to know that you’re sincere, and what better way to convey sincerity than in person. Good luck Sir. I can only imagine what you must be going through. Oh, and it also help to not go empty handed upon said visitation of your significant other.

    • T3P

      The point is the brother did something very wrong and he got caught. So he should not expect anything. Forget forgiveness, she can do anything she wants and if she forgives this then he will do it again.

    • Cam

      Sounds personal.

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    • IGNORANCE IS BLISS

      Well…technically if they aren’t married it isn’t considered cheating. He was a single dude jumpin off with her and other chicks, why she mad for?

  • spongetta citronella

    Agree with @goin deeper

    At first, I was gonna tell u to give it time…. she will be back. BUT u cheated on her with some1 SHE KNOWS + u let her find out in a shady azz way! Ur azz is fried like Popeyes Chicken!

    I think u gona have to chalk this up to the game. U have broken MAJOR trust. How will she ever trust u again…. around family? around friends? around co-workers?

    I think u only want her back cuz she dropped ur azz. If she woulda stayed, u wud be back to who.r.ing.

    U forgot the 80/20 rule & fell for the b.s. Dating is HARD AS HE11, so when u find a good one, u keep her. Good Luck! Only the UNIVERSE/Divine Love can work a miracle for this H.A.M!!!!

  • Choco aka Hippie

    I would say it may be COMPLETELY OVER especially if someone she knew you crossed way to many lines with that one!

  • TheBarberLady

    It’s a wrap dude. F U ooh ooh ooh!

  • Blue Moon

    I’m so proud of her for not givin u da time of day! More women need 2 develop a back-bone like her and know their worth! Ppl will treat u da way u let them treat u..big ups 2 her..now u need to sit in a corner and feel da consequences of ur actions..hw u throw away 3 years for a few hours?? Think about dat DUDE! *applauds her*

    • Upt-DC

      I so agree with you.

  • Shoediva

    Time heals all wounds. If the love is there she may be able to forgive but never forget. Give her some space, and let her come to you when she is ready. It won’t be an easy road, but don’t pressure her, it will only push her away. Good luck.

  • robbie

    register to be a guess on jerry springer.

    • BE

      ROTFL!!

  • Dirty Tree

    It’s over dude. Every women has a tolerance level and she’s feed up with your mess. Let it go and move on but learn from your mistakes. When you have someone good to take them for granted. Remeber love is shown through your actions not your words.

  • worldstarpimp

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  • Is It 5:00 Yet?

    Let her go and learn from your mistakes. If she takes you back, you’ll probably never hear the last of it. Then you would have wished she let you go.

  • c.r.p

    Probably feels like this cause he got caught. If you hadn’t had been caught, you would still be doing your dirt. You made your bed now sleep

  • dlv'za&&l

    as a woman who has been the victim of infidelity, i would like to say that it really all depends on the individuals within the relationship, stepping outside the box and reevaluating the ENTIRE relationship, the love, time, effort, feelings that have been put into it and determining whether or not if it’s worth sticking it out or just letting it go. i would agree that allowing her time would be best, you know what they say “if you love something let it go, if it comes back to you then it’s yours”. on another note i commend you for admitting your fault but don’t think that’ll put you back on her good side that just means you have a “conscience”. it’s obvious you love her, due to the fact your willing to do anything to get back with her. but everyone has a breaking point and you very could have caused her to find it!

    wish you the best and if it does work out, hopefully you won’t take her for granted again if not then i would suggest you take this as a lesson learned in life.

  • http://bossip MsFedUp

    Ur only sorry because u got caught if u didn’t u prolly would hit it again. And I hope she cut off the trifling friend too. U don’t deserve her and ur apology is pathetic. So go out and finish screwing the rest of your side of town and leave her alone so she can find a man worth her time. U cheated u got caught I hope she invites u to her wedding so u can see her with someone else. And all those punk a$$ tears u shedding save it it make u look supid

    • seek2027

      Dam girl lol

  • Cool Pretty Nerd

    If she cheated on you with a close friend,would you take her back?If so how quickly?You need to keep that in mind when reaching out to her,you have to be patient because forgiveness doesn’t come overnight.When you’re in the wrong,you have to respect your partners request to be left alone.You can’t try to reconcile on YOUR terms and within your time frame.You rushing her,though with good intentions may come off as you just running game.Back off and if she comes around you’ll know she did because that’s what she wanted and not because you sweet talked her.If not she wasn’t the one for you and vice versa,so you both would have just dodged a bullet…

  • YEAISAID IT

    HA

  • Rob

    Its some real bitter azz angry women on this site.

    • tamika

      no, not bitter, just smart,experienced and with a sense of self worth. That’s exactly what you do if you have a bit of the qualities I just mentioned: you move on and let him shed his crocodile tears because he got caught… not because he’s sorry, that’s for sure.

    • Rob

      What exactly does that have to do with this post?he asked for advice becuz he made a mistake,instead he got a bunch of negativity that has more to do with personal issues than the question.I notice this bitterness on almost all the posts.U seem pretty reasonable,u must not have read these responses.

    • tamika

      Rob,

      you just don’t seem to get it, do you? Or may be you don’t want to get it. This has nothing to do with bitterness. It is experience. This man got caught and now he is sorry? If he had really been sorry he would have told her. Either way, he deserves a lesser partner than the one he lost because he couldn’t keep his d*ck to himself. Women, show self respect and don’t take any idiot back because he is whining in front of your door matt. Should have thought about it earlier, before he caused her so much pain!

    • igotdistc

      i’m female and i agree…THEY ANGRY

    • http://www.unprotectedtalk.com theS.O.B.

      Not just on this site but the world. But we can’t blame them because we made them this way.

  • bouyant

    am glad she have good friends, you should move on, she will never trust you ever again, so whats the point, let her find happiness with a good man, and yes, they are out there.

  • seek2027

    I she serious now he wants to commit this fool he is only sorry that she found out he was cheating because before she found out it was all good for him. Good for her F that dud there are many men out there who would love to make her happy thing this clown should have been doing

    • seek2027

      I ment to say is he serious my bad

  • seek2027

    Nice i can agree with what you said

  • Jim Jone's Goon!

    Just Show up to her door with two guns and then do it! (KILL YOURSELF in front of her)

    • Cam

      Lmaooo Very dark, but funny as hell when picturing it.

  • 1love

    It amazes me that he mention that it was Foul the way she found out ?What Da fu*k!! Then you had the nerves to do it to some one that she knew let along she probably confided to a bout you and she pursued you and you bit da bait ?? What a fool the girl who you smashed probably didn’t like your azz from the start and then you wanna go out and do that? Not that you’ve got caught now you’re a better Man and what your bo bo back ? The only back you would get is the back of my azz to kiss as you see me walk out of your life .. Sn Go be with the girl you cheated on her with what ? She was good for you to cheat but she aint wifey to be with >> My point go find another cause if i was her it wont be me!! Once a cheater always a cheater you just get smarter that’s all

  • empathizer Emily

    It’s her fault you cheated. She made you do it.

  • MissLady

    The worst feeling is to hurt your significant other by cheating. Not as bad as being cheated on but its still makes you feel like a jerk! He knows that he was wrong and most likely feels like crap for cheating. Plus his girl isn’t making it any better by listening to her friends and not communicating with him. Time and communication heals if its true love. If it doesn’t work out its for the best. He just has to accept it and move on. Ladies and Gents ya’ll need to stop judging him so negatively. As humans we do the dumbest things at times. I mean I’m not taking up for him but your not in his shoes…yet!

    • tamika

      If it was true love, he wouldn’t have hurt her in the first place, not like that. And no, some mistakes should not be forgiven… cheating is one of them.

  • stop the madness

    first give her space
    don’t force the issue
    then make your point
    you were wrong , you learned
    your lesson, and now you want to commit and let her know the date you are willing to proceed with marrizage if she will have you.
    DON’T EVER IN LIFE SPEAK, LOOK AT, EVER BE FRIENDS AGAIN WITH THAT WOMAN. ever never..that is important
    don’t even have text messages from her or her friends

    • Cam

      Excellent advise.

  • 7lady

    Yall men crazy if you think we should sympathize with him. Hell no! He not only cheated he cheated with someone she knows! She can’t get over that! Yall need to gone with that..talkn bout give him some advice. I give his azz some advice alright. Advice to stay the f*ck away from her.

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