This is just NAAAAAAAAASTY! Talk about “riding dirty”
Kevin Brann must have been having one hell of a good time the morning of February 24 since he forgot to remove the “sexual anus plug in his rectum,” as the police report puts it. After arriving, Martin County police gave the perv a pat-down and things got nasty…. Real nasty after that:
“The defendant had a sexual anus plug in his rectum, which he removed, or it fell out in the rear of my patrol car,” an affidavit states.
“The length, girth and color of the “sexual anus plug in his rectum” was not listed in the affidavit. Also not specified was the make and model of the plug and an explanation of how it ended up in his bottom.
Annnnnnd to make the story absolutely worse…
Brann’s speech was slurred and mumbled, his eyes bloodshot and glassy. A deputy gave Brann, who’d urinated in his pants, field sobriety exercises before arresting him on a DUI with property damage charge. Brann “soiled himself” en route to the slammer.
This gives new meaning to the song “Doin’ The Butt”. Oh, Florida. Seriously, why is it always Florida with the crazies?