10 Burning Questions From NBA All-Star Weekend

- By Bossip Staff
5 of 11


This year’s NBA All-Star WeekeZzzzzzzz was a spectacular struggle that had potential but ultimately failed on every level possible. Mildly-enjoyable when you weren’t fighting sleep (or praying that Alicia Keys falls off the stage), it was clear that the NBA was: A) disconnected from its audience B) Anti-FUN and C) Anti-Rappity-Rap.

Here are ten burning questions for NBA All-Star weekend. Take a look.

Photo credit: Twitter

Singer Alicia Keys performs at half time during the NBA All-Star basketball game in Houston

Who gave Alicia Keys permission to leave her piano and dance in public?

The vocally-worthless audio terrorist is on a mission to make everyone hate her more than any other person (on Earth). Inspired by the Beyonce Doc, she “danced” awkwardly and terribly while squawking during the worst performance of the weekend.

Photo credit: Twitter


Why is Chris the ZESTasaurus Rex always in the wrong place at the worst possible time?

The glittery NBA weirdo is either trolling us all with perfectly-timed suspect behavior or just naturally pause-worthy, gleefully-zesty and tender. Either way, it’s oddly-hilarious and strange.

Photo credit: Twitter


Why is Drake such a dweeb?

Aubrey, like Bosh Spice, always feeds himself to the wolves. Some believe he’s trolling everyone but serving Bey & Hov refreshments is something light-bright rappers who bleed warm Almond milk do.

Photo credit: Twitter


Why does Kevin Hart try so hard to be funny?

The 5th grader sized-comedian is an unfunny little man when he’s not on his Ridalin. At times, he’s genuinely funny but kills his own jokes by doing the absolute most for no reason.

Photo credit: Twitter


Did these groupies accomplish their All-Star weekend mission?

Every year, elite groupie units flock to the festivities hoping to make their Basketball Wife dreams come true. Whether THESE thirsty slorebags connected with their targets (and sabotaged condoms) or not, we may never know.

Photo credit: Twitter


Will anyone ever care about J. Cole?

The socially-awkward Rap dork wants to be Jay-Z sooooooo bad but lacks Hovvy Hov’s charisma and IT appeal. Always young Simba and never Mufasa, Cole is still on Rap’s sidelines, at the end of the bench, two years after his debut.

Photo credit: Twitter

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    Was NBA All-Star weekend planned by anti-Rap Republicans?

    Phillip Phillips, Ellie Goulding, Fall Out Boy, Ne-Yo and Alicia Keys performed because “safe” and “ratchet-free” are obviously more important to the NBA than “entertaining.”

    Photo credit: Twitter


    Kobe Bryant doesn’t care that he’s the most hated NBA superstar alive?

    The hyper-competitive cornball was the only all-star playing hard during the All-Star Game because he’d rather be hated and booed, than somewhat liked by fans. Oh, Kobe.

    Photo credit: Twitter

    Alicia Keys

    Why would Alicia Keys perform “Empire State of Mind” in Houston, Texas?

    …the same reason she agreed to be Creative Director of BlackBerry in 2013. Terrible judgment.

    Photo credit: Twitter


    Does Dwight Howard know he’s super-corny?

    Nah, probably not….

    Photo credit: Instagram

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    • Jazmine

      Imma Need Yall Not To Talk About J. Cole! He’s A Great Rapper And I’m Sure There’s Plenty Of People Who Care About Him.

    • TDove

      This list had me cracking up while nodding my head yes

    • Fhares

      What an ignorant and hateful comment about J Cole.. He’s the One rapper whos music has more substance.. most others just rap stupidity..

    • Kris

      It’s funny that your lame azz says Kevin Hart isn’t funny all while you yourself are trying really hard to make jokes, but fail to even make me smirk.
      Kevin Hart is funnier on his worst days than you’ll ever be

    • Vick

      What a negative article

    • Guess

      Wowwww.. Figured that one would get moderated – bot because it was offensive (it wasn’t at all) but because it was true. These Black s it es are FOS..

    • shelnik

      Ten burning questions??? More like ten burning statements!!! How distasteful of this website, DON’T be a HATER all YOUR LIFE.

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