10 Questions About The North Korean Threat
Get your war bunkers together because crazy Kim Jong-un II is at it again. Yesterday the crazy North Koreans warned of an attack on the US that would be “merciless.” According to experts, North Korea doesn’t have the capabilities to send any nukes or anything to the US borders but we’re still a bit on edge. All of this craziness has us asking a few important questions.
And hey, we may even have answers to some.
Can They Really Bomb Us? – Well, according to US intelligence, they don’t have the technology to reach us at the moment. But…
How Good Is US Intelligence? – Um, we’re basically taking the government’s word that Korea can’t bomb us. Do we really want to trust them with our lives like that?
Can We Beat Their Army? – We think we can. We also thought we could dominate Vietnam too. So there’s that.
Where Does China Fit? – They’re a wildcard here and we definitely don’t want to make them mad. So we gotta make sure they’re cool with it, right?
Does Kim Jong-un Just Want The Lil Kim Name All To Himself? – If that’s what he wants, he can have it. Hell, we can send Kim herself!
Where Is Dennis Rodman? – Isn’t he supposed to save us all by kicking it with Kim? What happened to that?!
Doesn’t He Realize Kim Hasn’t Had Her Baby Yet?! – We can’t all get blown up without seeing baby Kimye, right?!
WTF Is Wrong With Kim Jong-un? – We think no one wanted to give him the goods when he was a kid. That’s gotta be it.
So We Shouldn’t Be Scared? – No. No? Maybe. Yes. Well, we’re not sure. But we’re going to go buy a bunch of SPAM just in case.