Ready To Vomit? Stormy Daniels Described Y’all President’s Toadstool Peen And Everyone Is Disgusted
Stormy Daniels Talks About Trump’s Junk
Here we go. Stormy Daniels’ book about Y’all President is coming out and, boy, it’s disgusting:
“He knows he has an unusual p****,” she writes. “It has a huge mushroom head. Like a toadstool.”
According to the Guardian, she adds that she “lay there, annoyed that I was getting f—ed by a guy with Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart.”
Ewwwwwww. We’re about to vomit. And you are, too.
This has lead to “Toad” and “Mario Kart” trending because y’all need Jesus and some help. Now excuse us while we take a very long shower and dip our bodies in bleach.
Bowser in the streets, Toad in the sheets 🙁
— Robbie Collin (@robbiereviews) September 18, 2018
Me, logging on first thing in the morning: oh why is Mario Kart trending, maybe today won’t be that ba— pic.twitter.com/kq2twgyiWz
— Vera Bergengruen (@VeraMBergen) September 18, 2018
SARAH SANDERS: The claim by Ms. Daniels that the president's dick resembles Toad from Mario Kart is patently ridiculous. This administration has long ago demonstrated that if his dick looks like any character from that series, it's Birdo. Thank you.
— Mike Tunison (@xmasape) September 18, 2018
When Toad logs onto Twitter and finds out why Mario Kart is trending. pic.twitter.com/fGsOWbPV7F
— Jeff J. (@JeffJSays) September 18, 2018
Hey everyone! You might be wondering why the word “Toad” is trending. It’s because everyone loves that classic Nintendo character!
*grabs your face, looks you dead in the eye* There is no other reason. Do not look for a reason.
— 🎃Foregone Erik💀 (@HonestlyJon) September 18, 2018
Americans need to prepare themselves physically and emotionally for the very real possibility that Sarah Sanders will stand behind a podium and deny that the president of the United States has a penis that looks like Toad from Mario Kart.
There will likely be charts.
— Rex Huppke (@RexHuppke) September 18, 2018
Me: Oh cool, Toad is trending. Wonder if they announced a new Mario Kart?!
Me: *after reading why its trending* pic.twitter.com/nfUHQmPcqV— Sharpie (@dapurplesharpie) September 18, 2018
Oh we are sharing our favorite Toad images today?
Mine is this one: Toad guarding two Yoshi eggs while wearing F.L.U.D.D. on his back pic.twitter.com/2p0jLHBdhF
— Nibel (@Nibellion) September 18, 2018
Continue Slideshow
I am Toad’s publicist. As you can imagine, this is a difficult moment for him and he will not be giving comment to the press until he’s had time to collect his thoughts pic.twitter.com/YyJB81DzDM
— Seth Rosenthal (@seth_rosenthal) September 18, 2018
Me: oh, Toad is trending! I wonder if they announced a new game this morning
…15 seconds later pic.twitter.com/4bV5zn5AbZ— Matthew Glenn 🏳️🌈 (@webnet) September 18, 2018
me before seeing why Toad is trending vs me after seeing why Toad is trending pic.twitter.com/8LsY05lfBG
— shauna (@goldengateblond) September 18, 2018
Donald Trump’s day so far:
– You don’t want to know what Stormy Daniels said about Trump and the toad from Mario Kart
– It’s his dick. He has a horrible dick.
– Speaking of dickheads, Brett Kavanaugh’s nomination is in trouble
– Today will get worse
– It’s still only 11am
— Palmer Report (@PalmerReport) September 18, 2018
if there's a tweet from the president of the united states refuting the toad reference i will truly self-combust
— Gideon Resnick (@GideonResnick) September 18, 2018
Toad. Trump. So many similarities. pic.twitter.com/I5CspqbbE9
— Holly Figueroa O'Reilly (@AynRandPaulRyan) September 18, 2018
Me: why is my little buddy Toad trending?
*finds out*
Me: pic.twitter.com/SMborCh5IT— T'ChAngie Thomas (@angiecthomas) September 18, 2018
the president is absolutely going to tweet about his Toad shaped dick
— 9 V O L T (@9_volt_) September 18, 2018
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