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You’ve got just as good of a chance of getting sufficient COVID stimulus checks from Republicans as you do winning this jackpot but hey, we can dream, can’t we?

Mega Millions

Source: MediaNews Group/Boston Herald via Getty Images / Getty

The Mega Millions lottery is getting pretty damn robust and people all over the country are headed to their local convenience stores to cop tickets in hopes of becoming filthy, f**king rich. In recent years, we’ve seen Mega Millions jackpots soar as ticket-buyers fail time and again to pull the winning numbers that would change their lives.

According to DailyMail, the $750 million pot is currently the fifth-biggest ever in history. Last night’s numbers were 12-14-26-28-33 with a Mega Ball of 09. As we mentioned previously, it will be no small feat to win that bread even if you buy one-hundred tickets. As it stands, the odds of pulling the winning digits are 1 in 302.5 million.

*insert Jim Carrey from Dumb & Dumber here*

If you’re looking for something a little easier to win, we suggest you try the $550 million Powerball. The odds of taking home that bag are 1 in 292.2 million.

Sure, you can win the smaller jackpots that might be very helpful at this difficult time but we all want that big bag. Good luck and godspeed.



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