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Squad car with siren blaring

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Florida will ALWAYS Florida even if Florida is in Kansas. According to a new DailyMail report, 23-year-old Joshua D. Swartwout of Naples, Florida made his state proud during a recent incident with the Kansas Highway Patrol in Atwood, Kansas.

This past Saturday, Swartwout was being taken to a detention center after being arrested subsequent to a police chase in a stolen car. During his ride to his new state-sanctioned residence, the officer who was driving witnessed a motorcycle wreck and hopped out to offer aid and assistance. Swartwout, being a good ol’ Florida boy, took that opportunity to make his not-so-great escape. Somehow, with the ingenuity that only a product of the state south of Georgia could manufacture, Joshua, with his hands cuffed BEHIND his back, gained control of the police cruiser and skrrrrrrrt-skrrrrrrrrrrt.

At this point, other KHP troopers who were en route to the motorcycle wreck had to chase Joshua “Ricky Bobby” Swartwout down Interstate 70 at an extremely high rate of speed, an estimated 100 MPH. A whole a$$ 30 minutes later, the lead-footed larceny suspect had run the gas tank empty and attempted to flee on foot. Obviously, that didn’t work and troopers arrested him without further incident.

If you’re wondering how any of this was even possible, the initial arresting officer said that Swartwout was sitting in the front seat because the rear did not have a protective cage.

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