Jennette McCurdy Details Relationship With Abusive Mother

“Red Table Talk” has returned!

Source: Jordan Fisher / Red Table Talk

Wednesday the show aired an episode with “iCarly” actress Jennette McCurdy that absolutely blew our minds. McCurdy recently published a memoir called, “I’m Glad My Mom Died,” which reveals the abuse and manipulation she endured throughout her childhood and young adult life at the hands of her mother.

In the episode, Jennette talked about her turbulent childhood, reading from her book, “I’m Glad My Mom Died,” about how when she was just two-year-old, her mother was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer, and as a result of her cancer became a hoarder:

“I remember a time when Marcus, Dustin, and Scott slept in their trundle bunk bed and I slept in my nursery, but now our bedrooms are so filled with stuff that you can’t even determine where the beds are, let alone sleep in them. We don’t sleep in the bedrooms anymore. Trifold mats were purchased from Costco for us to sleep on in the living room. I’m pretty sure the mats were meant for kids’ gymnastic exercises. I do not like sleeping on mine. This house is an embarrassment. This house is shameful. I hate this house.”

“…Because she was so close to seeing her fate, she suddenly attached meaning and significance to the tiny–I mean she’d say, ‘Well, you touched that Kleenex, so I need it.’ So she was keeping everything that me or my three older brothers touched, and it just overwhelmed our house. It really did not feel like a home. It felt like a place of chaos and of turmoil and turbulence.”

Listen, we are itching just hearing about it — particularly because Jennette described the place as having a “rat and possum problem.”

Jennette McCurdy’s Mother Taught Her Anorexia When She Was 11-Years-Old

During the episode, Jennette also reveals that her mother taught her calorie restriction and introduced her to anorexia when she was just 11-years-old.

“It’s quite unfortunate, but my mom taught me anorexia. She taught me calorie restriction when I was 11. I had felt a lump in my breast that I thought was, ‘Oh, well, my mom had cancer, so I’m probably getting cancer.’ And she said, ‘No, Net, that’s just boobies’ And I said, ‘Well, can I stop boobies from happening? I don’t want boobies. I don’t want to grow up.’ And I knew that my mom really wanted me to stay young. She really, really made that clear to me. She would sob and really clutch me intensely and say, like, ‘I don’t want my baby to grow up.’ And I knew me growing up would mean us separating, and I didn’t want that to happen, so I asked if there was a way that I could stop the boobies from coming in, and she told me, ‘Well, there’s a thing called calorie restriction.’”

“And it became our sort of secret and our code and something that, as disturbing as it is, really bonded us. It was our thing. No one else got this thing. We got this thing. I can look at you from across the room and know you got me and I got you and we were just in the disease, in the sickness. But there was a connection that the sickness that I, of course, couldn’t see at the time…”

As she struggled with her eating disorder, Jennette was simultaneously performing her role on ‘iCarly’ as a character who was obsessed with food.

“And what was interesting– Willow reminded me– she said that your character on that show was obsessed with food,” Jada Pinkett Smith said.

“Loved food! It was so confusing at the time. Being caught up in anorexia or binge-eating disorder or bulimia and then– while playing this character who’s slinging a fried chicken leg and beating people with a ham sandwich. It felt like my life was mocking me in a lot of ways, and it was really difficult,” Jennette revealed.

Jennette wasn’t the only one suffering in her household. She revealed that when she was around 11-years-old her mom used to make her and her 16-year-old teenage brother shower together and that she would bathe them both. The shower included a breast and “front butt” exam by her mother to check for lumps and bumps. Jennette also says her mother would chase her dad around the house with a steak knife.

“My mom would be chasing my dad around the house with a literal steak knife, and he’d say, ‘Deb, you have to get help. You have to get a handle on this. You can’t be doing this.’ She wouldn’t. She didn’t want to change or couldn’t face that she needed to change, and then, eventually in therapy, after just sort of sharing stories of my relationship with my mom, they suggested that she might have had some combination of bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, and narcissistic personality disorder. Maybe all three.

“Yeah, yeah. The steak knife thing, that was a frequent situation. There were many, many versions of the steak knife and other tools. She would grab sort of whatever was on hand, and our neighbor did threaten quite often to call social services. Our neighbor Bud. He would always pound on the door in the middle of the scream fights, and then my mom would hand him a box of See’s Candies and bribe him out of calling social services.”

Source: Jordan Fisher / Red Table Talk

Jennette McCurdy’s Mother Emailed Her A Letter Calling Her “A Little SLUT, A Floozy”

The part of the “Red Table Talk” episode that we’ve seen circulating most is probably when Jennette reads a scathing email her mother sent to her after she and then-boyfriend fled to Hawaii.

“There was a significant age difference, but I don’t respect how she handled it. She sent me many scathing emails just telling me exactly how disapproving she was…this is an email that my mom sent me, ‘Dear Net, I am so disappointed in you. You used to be my perfect, little angel, But now you are nothing more than a little–all caps–slut, a floozy, all used up. And to think you wasted it on that hideous ogre of a man. I saw the pictures on a website called TMZ. I saw you rubbing his disgusting, hairy stomach. I knew you were lying about Colton.” I had told her I was with a friend, Colton. Add that to the list of things you are– liar, conniving, evil ’You look pudgier too. It’s clear you’re eating your guilt. Thinking of you with his ding dong inside of you makes me sick, sick. I raised you better than this. What happened to my good little girl? Where did she go, and who is this monster that has replaced her?…You’re an ugly monster now. I told your brothers about you, and they all said they disown you just like I do. We want nothing to do with you. Love, Mom, or, should I say, Deb, since I am no longer your mother. P.S., send money for a new fridge. Ours broke.’ The P.S. gets me.”

YIKES! Right? We have heard of dysfunctional parent/child relationshipsn but this one probably takes the cake.

You can watch the full episode below. Make sure you’re following “Red Table Talk” to keep up with new episodes on Facebook Watch!