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Woman Attacks Newlywed Husband Because Of Giant Penis

One South African couple had a wedding night that neither one of them is likely to ever forget. Groom Mnobo Madyibi says he met his wife in church last year…at which point she stressed that she’d like to abstain from intercourse until they were married. But it seems like she may have at least wanted to get a peek at the merchandise before purchasing, because it turned out to be WAY more than she could ultimately handle.

The groom – apparently nicknamed “Anaconda” by pals who’ve seen what he’s working with in the soccer locker room – claims his virgin wife was so frightened by the size and girth of his peen that she decided to attack him rather than take it. As he told The Daily Star:

“All was well and she enjoyed the foreplay. But all hell broke loose the moment I took off my underwear.

My wife said she wanted a 4-5 inside her, not an anaconda. When I tried to penetrate her, she bit my ear before squeezing my balls.

Before I knew it, she knocked me over with a bottle of wine before attempting to suffocate me with a red and white teddy bear I’d bought her as a gift.”

Mnobo claims he scremed so loud during the attack that he woke other sleeping guests in their Coffee Bay, South Africa bed and breakfast. Needless to say, nothing further went down between them that night.

“We took different buses back home. I don’t want to lay charges against my new wife. I love her.

I think she’s angry because I could only afford a cheaper honeymoon instead of the one she wished for in Zanzibar.”

We aren’t sure that’s quite enough reason for a vicious, ball-twisting attack…but he knows her better than we do. Either way, his wife, who refused to share her name with the press, denies that the incident was quite that dramatic — though she did reiterate that she had no plans of wrecking her insides with all that peen he’s packing.

“He has a big penis – long like a cucumber and hairy and scary like a bush.

I only slapped him on the cheek.”

The couple has thankfully agreed to go to couple’s counselling and not involve the police.

Do you think it’s truly possible that it was that serious…or is the inexperienced bride probably just being a bit over-the-top? What she described didn’t sound all that appealing after all…



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