Sextra: She’s A Very Freaky Girl … Almost Too Freaky!!

- By Bossip Staff

Hello Bossip I would love a third party opinion on this. I am a 33year old southern boy and I spent most of my time in the church and playing sports growing up. This was my mom and dad’s way of keeping me and my brothers out of the streets. I lived a very sheltered life and didn’t really know how much my parents sacrificed until I came of age myself. I am the middle child and I was always a little different from my brothers. Out of the three of us, I was the only one to get a full academic scholarship to a university out of state and my brothers got partial athletics. I have an appreciation for the arts and people who make a way for themselves using their own creative thoughts. I like to think I’m a little more well rounded as in, not as macho. I moved to New York City (Harlem) about two years ago and I met this beautiful brown skinned woman who grew up outside the city. She’s very poised, exposed and worldly. She plays the violin and piano, speaks a second language (french) and took off to the French countryside after she dropped out of college and stayed for three years. She’s definitely a free spirit and I admire so many things about her. I believe that she’s mostly attracted to my stability and need for structure. The difference in dynamics work until we get to the sexual realm of our relationship. I feel that certain things are unsavory and unnecessary. When we are intimate she says filthy things that don’t turn me on at all. She wants me to choke her and slap her across her face and she’s very into public indecency. For example we were driving to New Jersey to see some of my old friends and she forcibly hooked me up while I was driving. I can admit that I was intrigued by this at first, but it’s a little too much for my taste. I know that her time in France probably has a lot to do with the sense of sexual liberation but there’s a time and place for everything….I feel. Before you hand me my face from the floor I must say that I’m not a prude or scared of an aggressive woman. I’m just a guy who loves intimacy and feeling a deep closeness with my woman without the extra stuff. I think it’s takes something meaningful away from the connection. Is this going to be a problem in the future or is this something that can be worked on?

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  • whitwhit

    I never heard a man saying stuff like that..(shrugs) to each it own..

  • WithAllHonesty

    You soft, I’ll take her!

    • WithAllHonesty

      Naw, seriously, bruh, it’s called spontaneity. Have some fun or you’re really going to end up boring this girl and regretting you didn’t take it up a notch because she will go elsewhere.

  • team nymphis

    R.U serious?
    You complainin about gettin bobblehead while you drivin? That’s the best part of the road trip.especially if you can get some trucks to drive by while she’s eatin outta ya lap. You better go to and step your game up before yo azz be back in church askin the lord what happened and she’ll be takin them road trips wit one of yo brothers.

    • Pretty Brown Eyes


    • Ummm...

      Ditto… LOL

  • Assailant2011

    comment check

  • A$$ailant2011

    dudes a p***y

  • ShawnNeverSetttles

    Well sit her down and explain how it makes you feel and see if the two of you can find a median. It’s good to have a woman that is so sexual but at the same time she needs to learn how to turn it into being sensual. She may just be a very sexual beast that has not been taught how to MAKE LOVE. She may also be a woman that has had some kind of bad sexual experience growing up and now feels this is how she is suppose to behave. Let her know she means more to you than that. Tell her to just relax and lay there while you SHOW HER how to make love, start by giving her a slow and intimate massage from head to toe, mix it with firm touches as well as soft sensual ones, lay kisses all over her body and play in her hair while you are kissing her on her neck softly, whisper in her ear while you hold her waist and pull her in close to you, last but not least make slow love to her (as slow as you can stand it) this will allow her to FEEL EVERY SINGLE THOUGHT YOU ARE HAVING, in turn she will begin to feel what it feels like to be loved instead of freaked, once she experiences this she will want more and more of it because you will have touched a part of her that apparently no one ever has. Be sure to have some nice smelling candles lit in the room while you have really romantic music playing that the two of you can enjoy making love to,….and be sure to set the CD to repeat all just in case you make it all the way through the CD, ….you don’t want to be at a very good point of love making and the CD ends, this would be tragic…..Teach her that it is okay to ALLOW SOMEONE TO LOVE HER, this will also show her what you like and she will want to return the favor, not only because that is what she knows you like but she has also come to appreciate and enjoy it as well,….now wiht that being said, there will be times that she still will want to being the freak out, EVERY woman does….lol Just make sure she knows you would rather haaveher all to yourself at home.

    • DYT PYT

      Well damn! This is what every woman needs! A little bit of both but sensuality is so important when you are grown. She sounds a little young to me. I think a lot of woman go through this phase but she picked the wrong dude to do it with. Bless his and her heart.

    • ok....dayumm

      @Shawm…..that was hot!

    • ShawnNeverSettles

      Well I know that as a woman this is what I like so she will appreciate it because he will be touching her heart instead of just her body and she will crave that feeling more and more. People better get with the program, I am NOT getting in bed to play with it…
      Thank you for agreeing, this person needs to see that women need this and in return they will get what they want as well.

    • Isis

      I MEAN DANG SHAWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
      (copying and pasting and sending to my man)

    • ShawnNeverSettles

      @Isis…….lmbo, I feel ya….a lot of times men don’t realize what ALL they can get if they give us what we want as well….lol

  • pridefulblackman

    Gotta get with the program bro. If you want do these ‘freaky’ things with her she’ll find another man to do it.

    • ShawnNeverSettles

      That is true, that is why it is best to find balance. Most of the time when people get what they want they are more willing to compromise so if he does this and she likes it and does more of what he wants then I am sure he won’t mind doing what she wants too. There are men that don’t want to just be used too ya know…lol

  • DJ's Mom

    Perhaps, you need to find a new boo whose sexual tendencies are more in line with yours.

  • team nymphis

    shawn you must have kids, cuz that sounds like the kinda fckn you do when you ain’t sure they sleep.

    • ShawnNeverSettles

      I do but who said we were quiet,… We have sensual talk then there are times that we talk S###. We just have a great balance.

  • WithAllHonesty

    I agree. Sensual is important but she’s pouncing on him like that because he’s not layin it down and she trying to get him to step it up. Her next step is either dumpin him or steppin out on him.

    If they’re not sexually compatible then scrap the relationship.

  • Nayya


    That was on point, for real. That is what these so-called men out here need to learn when they think they’ll really doin it on ’em, but she faking/rushing it because she thinks he should be more experienced and will therfore move on to the next one.

    As for the gentleman who wrote in, talk to her and read ShawnNeverSettles’ post about 20 times. Try it and if you don’t see a change in her after a month or so…keep it moving.

    • ShawnNeverSettles

      Thanks, she may be the type that does not know her worth yet and thinks that she is showing him she wants to be with him and may be trying to make sure he stays with her by being a freak, that is the wrong approach though. If he can’t get some compromise after he does that then she is just not compatible with him and he needs to move on because either she is not ready or she is just a freak only…lol

  • ok....dayumm

    CTFU! Nice and slow every now and then lets a woman know that you really have feelings for her. But you’re right…most of us do like to be pounded to smithereens the majority of the time.

  • bouyant


  • ???

    This sounds like a man with a lot of self-respect. Something every person should have in their life. ❤

  • Louisiana Lickable Lips

    @ Team Nymphis & @WAH,

    Yall need to stop.

    CONSTANT sexual aggression= emasculation

    Trading Places is good for all r-ships, but to be constantly harra.s.s.ed & “pounced” upon by a woman is a turn off to most men.

    Imma throw a lil shade at both of yall & say: U must havent had any in a while (srry fellas, i had to say it). I still have lots of e-love 4 both of u :p

    • WithAllHonesty

      my mistake i missed that she likes to be smacked across the face lmao…

      Umm girl’s a wierdo or has had some sexual abuse.

  • team nymphis

    lickable lips

    No problem.

    I like sexually confident women.

  • team nymphis

    maybe they can compromise and instead of slappin her.when she’s givin him mouf he can jus pull his shxt out and hit her in the jaw wit it.

  • Louisiana Lickable Lips

    OMGeeeeeeee!!!! Too Funny!

  • Louisiana Lickable Lips

    Arent u only 19?

  • I'm ze true silver hare

    Yes, did my statement allude anything to the contrary?

  • Louisiana Lickable Lips

    I knew a man who got turned off by a chick being too aggressive

    She approached him, lured him over for sex, & on their 1st sexual encounter, she wanted to be choked & spanked. She was only 19! He was 33.

    He told me he thought it was too weird & freaky for her to want all of tht on their very 1st nite.

    This was a very manly man, who would put on a skull cap when we role played him being a “thug.” So, he was open to different sex. But, i think since she was sooooooo aggressive from the beginning, he wasnt feeling it.

    At the end of the day, a Man wants to be a MAN!


      I think it’s safe to say that most men don’t know what the heck they want. If the woman isn’t freaky enough, he’s cheating, if she’s too freaky, he’s complaining. Make up your doggone mind men.

  • Louisiana Lickable Lips

    Call me old fashioned, but I would FREAK OUT if my 19 y.o. dtr said she knew about “aggressive sex.”

    That is all….carry on, Hunney!

  • team nymphis


    A skull cap.

    • Louisiana Lickable Lips

      I meant, doo-rag. My bad….

  • I'm ze true silver hare

    Oh no Miss, you must have misunderstood. I meant to say that I knew little about sex, especially aggressive I too would be perturbed if my 19 year old knew a lot about “aggressive sex” but unfortunately there are a lot of people my age who do know a lot about things of that nature. You wouldn’t believe some of the stories I hear from my peers. Sometimes I think I was born in the wrong generation.

  • team nymphis

    that’s some crazy shxt. He got on a skull cap puttin cigarettes out on yo booty wit a pistol nxt to the bed.

    Thug passion

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