In a recent radio interview, severely-delusional man-boob model/rapper Rick Ross told one of the greatest lies ever while explaining why his tour was canceled. It wasn’t the gang threats but ONE promoter who held the entire tour back. If you believe this, then you’ll definitely believe these incredible lies and fairy tales told by rappers.
Here are ten of the greatest lies ever told by Rappers. Take a look.
“I was in too deep like Mekhi Phife” – Kanye West, “I Don’t Like (Remix)” –
Yeezy really rewrote history to make words rhyme and now thousands will forever confuse Mekhi Phifer with Omar Epps. Somehow, this is all Kimmy Cakes fault.
“Detox coming soon” – Dr. Dre –
“Detox” has been “coming soon” for most of our lifetime. On Game’s “Higher,” Dre randomly descends from space just to say “look out for Detox.” Seven years later, “Detox,” like the AIDs and Cancer cures, is still “coming soon.”
“I’m sellin dope, straight off the iPhone” – Rick Ross, “9 Piece” –
…with Apple’s drug transaction app, right Ricky? Of course you do.
Photo credit: Instagram
“Young [Insert rapper here]” –
Young Hov. Young Jeezy. Young Buck. All old(er). Yes, Rap is a young man’s game but most of our favorite rappers marched with Dr. King and that’s perfectly OK.
“Still ride with that 44/Don’t let my P-O know/Bad white b*tch, super thick/I’m Ice T, she Coco” – T.I., “Go Get It” –
TIP, bruh, you’re the Cliff of the hood Huxtables on a quality reality TV program. Let the exotic ho fantasies and street tales go. No one believes you.
“I’m at Pluto, I’m at Mars at the same damn time” – Future –
No one’s going to tell Future that Pluto isn’t a planet anymore? NONE of you? And even then, how is this possible? It’s like being at Wal-Mart and Target at the same time. Future gotta relax.
“I’m in Red Lobster with my shirt off n*gga eatin on shrimp” – Plies –
And STILL, no pictures of a Hobbit-sized rapper eating shrimp inside a Red Lobster without a shirt have surfaced. Not one.
Photo credit: Twitter
“Weezy F. Baby and the F is for phenomenal” – Lil’ Wayne –
The F……is for phenomenal? Kids, don’t be like this 30-year-old 5th grader in the animal print hosiery you see on TV. Stay in school and just say NO.
Photo credit: Instagram
“I’m the illest female that you heard thus far” – Amil, “4 Da Fam” –
Before she was the illest female in her Dillard’s department, Amil was the illest in all of Hip-Hop, making $40K/guest verse as the Roc’s first lady? Riiiiiiiight.
“I’m doin shows for 250 now…” – Soulja Boy, “Foreign Cars” –
250…what? Dollars? Silky bandanas? Because we know even the jankiest of promoters ain’t paying Soulja $250,000 to do anything rap-related in 2012.
Photo credit: Instagram
